


BURNED OUT

by LasEstrellasdelPurgatorio



Category: Promare (2019)
Genre: Arson, Attempt at Humor, CPTSD, Consequences of Being a Messiah, Dissociation, Exhaustion, Fire, Fluff in Chapter Five, Heavy Angst, Lio Fotia Whump, Lio Fotia's questionable self esteem, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Panic Attacks, Paranoia, Post-Canon, References to Underage Sex, Self-Blame, Self-Destructive Behavior, Self-Hatred, Survivor Guilt, eating issues, underweight
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-15
Updated: 2021-01-24
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:35:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 34,650
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27018184
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LasEstrellasdelPurgatorio/pseuds/LasEstrellasdelPurgatorio
Summary: He must not stop, he will not let himself fail. He cannot afford to fail again, he will carry them all to a better future.
Relationships: Burning Rescue Members & Lio Fotia, Gueira/Meis (Promare), Lio Fotia & Galo Thymos, Lio Fotia & Gueira & Meis, Lio Fotia/Galo Thymos
Comments: 44
Kudos: 68





	1. Chapter 1

_Click, click, click._

That’s his routine these days.

_Click, click, click._

Wake up, go to work, come back to Galo’s apartment to try and figure out the paperwork he has to do to get decent housing for his people.

Just a few months ago, he thought he would die before he could ever have a routine in his life.

Well, one that wasn’t just “survive.”

~~One that wasn’t “fail.”~~

“Lio!” He hears called out as the door swings open, Galo entering triumphantly, “I’m home!”

Not bothering to look up from the laptop he was given, Lio greets back, “Welcome home.”

“You can at least pretend to sound happy to see me!” The other man complains as he removes his work gear, “I’m stuck at the station for two days and I don’t even get a kiss hello?! What the heck man?!” He complains. “Are you still working on that proposal thingy?”

“Obviously,” Lio dismisses as he hears Galo approach the couch, focusing one ear to determine his location ( _ ~~In case he tries to choke him/ Galo wouldn’t do that~~_ ), “I’m trying to work out something with the building permits, so it’s going to take some research.”

Moving to sit down with one cushion between them ( _ ~~Because Lio’s an idiot who’ll black out and punch him if Galo tries to move closer~~_ ) Galo takes a breath before saying, “You know…if you’re having trouble with some of this stuff,” and Lio knows what he’s going to say before he does, he’s been saying things like this for months, “I think some of the guys I talked to at the rehab place said they used to work with stuff like that before they were Burnish, so maybe they could-”

“It’s fine, I can handle this.”

“If you just asked, I’m sure they’d-”

“It’s. Fine.”

Furrowing his brows, Galo shoots back, “Lio, if there’s a way to make it easier to get this done, you should do it! And if they probably know more about it than you, they can probably do this without messing something up!”

“So this is about my incompetence then, is that what you’re implying?” He says with plenty of bite behind the passive tone of his words.

“What?! No! You’re good at plenty of things, but you just learned how to use a computer! Getting help from someone who knows more about something than you is just doing what makes sense!”

“Yes, I suppose I should listen, after all you’ve always been such a pillar of rational thought, Galo Thymos.”

“UGGGHHH!” Galo groans, flapping a hand over his eyes, “Why do you have turn everything into a fight?! You know I’m just trying to help, and you’re just being stubborn!”

“So you would prefer me to bother people that are trying their best to reintegrate into modern society then figure this out by myself?” He snaps back.

“No,” Galo denies, “I’d rather you get help from someone who knows what they’re doing so there’s less of a chance something gets messed up and you hate yourself for it!”

“…”

“You know I’m right.”

“That must be exciting for you to finally experience.”

Sticking his tongue out and blowing a raspberry, Galo smirks in victory, “Diss me all you like, this round goes to the Great Galo Thymos!” Thrusting his hips out triumphantly, Galo hoots and hollers his own cheers, circling around the seated Lio.

“If you keep that little dance of yours up,” Lio remarks, “Then you’ll have to remove your pants for the next round.” Eyes flashing as he leans into Galo’s ear, pulling him down by the shirt, he whispers seductively, _“I’ll give you something to thrust against.”_

Blushing red like a cherry, Galo bounces away, covering his face and jerking in all directions, squealing, “ _GAAHHH!_ Lio, you perv! Why is everything sex with you?! You’re filthy! Filthy, filthy, filthy!”

Smirking slightly ( ~~Because he’s too broken to smile, Galo wants to see it, but he can’t, he’s worthless~~ ) Lio shoots back, “Why are you such a prude? With how often you strip in the middle of the day, I don’t think there’s a person alive that would even consider you were such a pure, untouched white lily before I got to you.”

“ _GAAAAHHHHHH! You can’t use pretty words like that for sex!”_

“But I thought you liked it?” He asks in feigned shock. “All those nights, calling you my beautiful darling, the lovely flower blooming right in front of my eyes, releasing gorgeous songs of pleasure as I-”

“LIO! _STOOOOOOOPPPPP!”_ Galo demands as he goes to cover Lio’s mouth, stopping just before he makes contact at the sight of Lio flinching, “Oh…sorry,” he says mutedly, animated reactions stalled ( ~~Lio always ruins his day~~ ).

“It’s fine,” Lio excuses, going back to work, “I was overreacting, it was ridiculous.”

“Lio, you weren’t…You just…GAAAGGGHHH!” Galo says in exasperation, “What’s going on in your head isn’t dumb, you’ve got every right to be messed up over what happened, so if it freaks you out, that’s what happens! You can’t control it, so stop beating yourself up about it already!”

“I should be able to tell the difference between a Freeze Force officer and you,” Lio dismisses, “The fact that I can’t is just a testament to my shortcomings.”

“Lio.” Galo starts as he slams the top of the laptop, “Human brains screw with people and dig stuff out to make things harder on you. There’s no point in blaming yourself for stuff you can’t control, okay?”

“…”

“Okaaaaay?!” Galo says again, leaning in and shaking his head with puffed cheeks and wide eyes with furrowed eyebrows.

“…tcch,” Lio concedes, chuckling slightly, “You are completely determined to never let any negative emotion flow throughout your apartment, aren’t you?”

“‘Our’ apartment,” Galo stresses, “The same one whose kitchen looks like it hasn’t been visited since I left for work! When was the last time you ate, Lio?!” He interrogates, pointing a finger accusingly at the smaller male.

“I had a package of powdered sugar donuts earlier,” Lio dismisses as he opens back up his laptop and begins typing again, “I’ll be fine.”

“That’s not a meal!” Galo scolds, “Wait a minute…” He says with wide eyes as he begins to realize, “When did you eat those?”

“Hmm…” _When was it?_

“Lio…” Galo whimpers.

“Ah!” Lio says as he remembers, holding a finger up in realization, “Yesterday morning.”

“LIO!” Galo shrieks, “YOU HAVEN’T EATEN SINCE BEFORE WE LEFT FOR WORK YESTERDAY MORNING?!!!”

“Obviously.” Lio says indifferently as he types.

Angrily grumbling as he starts to pull at his hair, Galo finally stamps his foot and takes a breath, smacking his cheeks as he regains control of himself. “Okay,” he breathes out, “I am going to go cook you dinner, you stay here and think about how stupid you are.” And with that, Galo turns and marches towards the kitchen.

“That’s not necessary,” Lio tries to protest, finally turning his head towards his partner, “You just got off of an overnight and two all day shifts, you don’t need to waste whatever energy you have left on me.”

“Making you food is not a waste,” Galo shoots back as he begins tying on an apron, “You have just as much of a right to eat as anyone else, so quit bitchin’ and wait.” Closing his eyes and smirking, he declares, “And the Universe’s #1 Firefighting Idiot, the Great Galo Thymos never runs out of energy!”

He’s lying, there’s bags under his eyes and he’s yawning, the adrenaline from work barely emitting half as strong of an output now that he’s focused on cooking, but Lio knows better by now then to try and get Galo to admit it.

“All your naps at work say otherwise,” he settles on, temporarily feeling enjoyment from Galo’s offended squawk.

_He’s exhausting himself for you, you’re the one who messes up everything and he’s the one who has to take care of it. He’s given you a comfortable life and you can’t give him one thing he wants in return. You’re using him._

Gritting his teeth, Lio turns back to his work.

_You’re just like Foresight._

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

The curry’s good.

Galo didn’t put much spice in it, something about it hurting the stomach lining and Lio needing to ease into eating properly.

“Lio?” Galo says, interrupting himself in the middle of some story involving Heavy Machine Operator Truss and a herd of cows, “You’re doing it again.”

“Hmm?” Lio hums before Galo gestures to his plate, “Oh.” He says at the food he was dividing unconsciously for the others. “Sorry, it’s a habitual response to food.”

Sighing, Galo says, “I get it man, and you’re a total saint, I love that about you, but the other Burnish are all right now so you can worry about yourself from now on. Finish up your food.”

Giving a slight glare at Galo’s patronizing demands, Lio remarks, “It’s too much for me to finish anyway, the proportions you give are outrageous.”

“That’s the point!” Galo argues, “You need to eat a little more everyday so your stomach gets used to food again! It’s all shriveled up from disuse!”

“I’m not even hungry at the moment…”

“That’s because your body’s too tired to realize it’s starving!” To further illustrate his point, Galo rushes to crouch behind Lio and, in an incredibly ridiculous voice attempting to replicate a Russian accent, says, “ _Lio, why? Why won’t you feed me? I’m so hungry, why won’t you eat the food your super cool boyfriend makes you? If you don’t eat soon, I’m going to waste_ _away_ _into nothing! WHY?”_

Giving a slight chuckle at Galo’s antics, Lio takes a few more bites to humor him, stopping at about half of the plate being cleared.

“I…”

“Can’t eat anymore?” Galo observes, getting to his feet.

“I’m…sorry…”

“Don’t be!” Galo dismisses, “We just gotta work on it, a bit more each day, remember?” Grabbing Lio’s plate, he adds his own clear one and heads for the kitchen.

“I don’t mean…to waste food.”

“You’re not wasting anything,” Galo tries to placate, “This just gives you leftovers for tomorrow; if it’s too much for you, you’ll get sick and hurt your tummy.”

“Yes, but-”

“I know you appreciate it Lio,” Galo cuts him off as he starts washing the silverware, “So you don’t have to prove anything to me, I’m happy just to see you eat something, dude.”

To that, Lio spends the next few minutes watching Galo clean up, the other man refusing help.

He wants to be held. Lio can tell, he’s noticed Galo keeps rubbing his shoulders on things, twisting one leg around the other, sneaking glances at Lio’s arms.

But Lio can’t do that.

If he tried, there’s a good chance he’d end up trying to burn Galo’s face off; when he realized that wouldn’t work through his panicking, he’d turn to clawing Galo’s eyes out. This is due to Lio’s inability to tell the present from the past, another ridiculous weakness that he has.

Fortunately…

“Galo?” He calls out, gaining the other man’s attention, “How tired are you?”

…He has ways to get around it.

“I’m not tired!” Galo protests, “I’ve got energy comin’ out my heels!” He declares, shuffling his feet in demonstration.

“That’s good to hear,” Lio says in a sultry voice, “Because I was thinking you could help me warm up tonight.”

Eyes widening, Galo says in a daze, “You…You mean…”

“Yes.”

“We’re finally gonna see how many of my sweaters I can put you in at the same time?!” Galo squeals in excitement, eyes sparkling, “I’m thinking we can make it to six before we start seeing any problems!”

“What,” Lio says in exasperation, “No-Galo we’re going to have sex.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“Okay!” The other agrees, finishing the dishes, “See you in a few minutes!” And with that, he rushes off to his bedroom.

He doesn’t have any problems with sex.

Sex doesn’t give him any bad memories.

The contact there doesn’t kick his perception out, it grounds him.

It’s the only way he can hold Galo.

It’s pathetic.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Pulling out of a panting Galo, blushing, face showing utter pleasure, Lio’s warm.

Not in the normal way, but the one that fills you up inside and makes you feel like everything is going to end well, that everything is fine.

It’s not, but Lio appreciates the momentary euphoria.

“Lio…” Galo pants.

Still riding the high from sex, Lio can let Galo touch him, lace their fingers together, nuzzle their noses together once Lio lets him know it’s alright.

A signal that takes the form of Lio stroking Galo’s cheek with a small but completely fond smile.

Galo eagerly acknowledges it.

Several moments of pure bliss follow, Lio wishes it would last forever.

Forever is cut short by the paranoia closing back in on his consciousness.

Pulling back, forcing himself to ignore Galo’s whine in protest, Lio gets up, collects his clothing and begins his return to the living room.

“Lio…” He hears Galo mumble, resigned but with the ever-present hope that nothing can seem to evaporate.

“…” Lio forces himself not to look back.

“Stay.”

“…I’m sorry.”

Exiting the room, hastily shutting the door Lio paces quickly to the couch, harshly landing himself onto the seating place and reopening the laptop with more force than necessary.

_Click, click, click._

He’s a terrible partner.

_Click, click, click._

He failed at being a leader.

_Click, click, click._

He’s struggling with basic skills every person should have.

_Click, click, click._

His people have been traumatized because of his incompetence.

_Click, click, click._

_He’s_ traumatized people because he couldn’t control himself.

_Click, click, click._

He’s completely useless.

_Click, click, click._

And he seems to be the only one that knows this.

_Click, click, click._

Cold.

In his chest, all around him.

Warmth, gone with the Promare, along with whatever worth he had.

What’s left of him?

_Click, click, click._

Nothing that anyone can use.

_Click, click, click._

He will still try.

_Click, click, click._

He will find a way to give his new life worth, he will be someone useful in this world of peace.

_Click, click, click._

He just needs to keep pressing forward.

_Click, click, click._

He will not stop.

_Click, click, click._

He cannot stop.

_Click, click, click._

If he does, there is no purpose in his continued existence.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lio knows his place. He forgot it once.

“And, there!” Marcus eventually says, “All done, Boss!”

Taking a look at the newly revised documents, Lio nods in approval before meeting the man’s eyes, “Thank you Marcus, you have truly assisted me well. I apologize for taking time away from you, it was my responsibility, I should not have bothered you.”

Waving off Lio’s apologies, Marcus tries to pacify him, “It wasn’t that bad, this is some pretty basic stuff, so it’s not like you cost me my weekend.”

All the more reason Lio should have been able to handle it himself but didn’t.

Pathetic.

“Well I should be able to handle it from this point,” Lio responds, “So I won’t be coming to bother you with this again.”

“Are you sure you don’t want me to finish up? There’s not much left, and I know that those firefighters have got you runnin’ around like crazy lately.”

Lio knows he should say, “No,” and handle it himself, it’s his responsibility to look after his people, they shouldn’t have to take time out of recovering for his incompetence.

But if there’s a chance he did something wrong…

“If you would not mind…”

“Of course!” Marcus agrees enthusiastically, “This is just the stuff I need to get ready to get back to work! I’ll take care of it!”

Thanking him, Lio’s phone begins to make a sound. Checking it reveals the alarm Galo set to let Lio know it’s time to return to the station before his lunch break ends.

“I need to leave now,” he says as gets up, “I will contact you as soon as I am able to see your progress. Thank you.”

“No problem! See ya round, Boss!”

Just before Lio can go out the door, Marcus suddenly calls out, “Oh wait!”

Turning back, Lio responds with a, “Yes?”

“A bunch of us are gettin’ together tonight, you should come!”

“Oh, I don’t know if-”

“Come on! We’re gonna get drunk, get loud-Oh! Gueira and Meis are comin’!”

Freezing, Lio nearly loses his balance at their names.

The people he…

“Apologies,” he says in false calm, “But I’m afraid that I will be far too busy tonight, perhaps another time.” And with that, he walks out.

“Uh…okay.”

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

When he reaches Galo and his bike outside, he hands him the phone to turn off the alarm.

“See?” Galo chirps, “Easy!”

“I am aware of my incompetence,” Lio says curtly, “It is unnecessary to bring it up, Galo Thymos.”

“You’re not dumb, Lio!” Galo interjects, “There’s just a bunch of stuff you never got to learn about! So I’m gonna help you! Got it?!” He asks, pouting and pointing a finger at Lio.

“If it will keep you from making a scene, then fine.”

Pulling back a bit, wide eyed, Galo asks, “What’s got you so wound up?”

Taking a breath, trying to calm down because he’s taking his problems out on Galo _again, because it’s not enough that he’s using Galo, no, he has to make him into a punching bag._

“I am fine,” he tries to start, “I apologize for my tone, please do not worry. May we please return to the fire station now?”

“Uh-uh,” Galo denies, “We’re not going anywhere until you feel better!”

“Galo…”

“What’s wrong?” Galo asks, gently, “Something happen?”

“I’m fine.”

“Lio…”

“It’s not important.”

Pulling at his hair in frustration, Galo grunts out, “Uaagggghhhh, Lio! If something’s bugging you, I wanna help! If you don’t wanna talk about it right now, I won’t push you, but if you keep bottling it up, you’re just gonna explode! You really want that to happen?!”

“You mean again?”

Fire, burning the city, a dragon led by the feelings he failed to control…

“Hey!” Galo cuts in, pressing his forehead against Lio’s, “Stop! No, no, no! No self-loathing!”

“Galo-”

“No!”

“I-”

“No!”

“Wh-”

“NOOOOOOOO.”

“…You’re lucky you’re cute.” Lio says with a chuckle and slight smirk.

Beaming at that, Galo pulls back and starts marching in place. “Well, now that you feel better, we can head back! Let’s go!”

Starting on their way, Lio begins to say, “I’m…sorry that you have to wait for me all the time-”

“EEEAAAAGGH! What’d I say about self-loathing?!”

“But it’s not fair to-”

“In case you haven’t noticed, I happen to _like_ spending time with you! And I know you don’t feel comfortable having anyone else monitor you yet, so it just gives me another way to help people! It’s a win-win!”

“Do you ever find it to be tiring to be so perpetually optimistic?” Lio asks rhetorically.

“Do you ever get tired of being such a colossal downer?” Galo shoots back.

“How rude, it would appear that I’m rubbing off on you.” Lio teases.

“How cheeky, it would appear I’m rubbing off on you!” Galo mocks back at him.

Bantering with Galo’s surprisingly sharp mind always manages to lighten his mood. Even amongst his people, very few would attempt to speak to him as an equal, that was a luxury that was not available for him.

He was allowed to speak to them, and that in itself was enough, there was no point in wanting more. When compared to those who would run away in fear from him, even some of his fellow Burnish, being on a level where he could still speak with them, even if it was only to give orders and provide reassurances, was a glorious enough privilege, especially when compared to the isolation he lived in before he found Mad Burnish.

It didn’t matter if he was lonely.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Arriving back at the station, Galo leads him to the break room to collect their lunch.

“You are gonna _love_ the sandwich I made you!” The taller proudly declares, “I got the cheese from this snooty bougie cheese shop from the north side of town, and the meat came from this cool deli the captain told me about.”

“Galo,” Lio starts uncomfortably, “I told you, you shouldn’t spend so much money on me, it’s…wasteful.”

“And I told _you_ ,” Galo shoots back, “Spending money on you isn’t a waste! In fact, I _like_ spending money on you, it makes me feel great! If there’s a chance it makes you happy, I’m goin’ for it!” He exclaims, thrusting his hips while pointing back at Lio and proclaiming, “So you just gotta deal with it!”

“Now, what did I say would happen if you kept up that little dance of yours?” Lio says in a sultry voice as he pulls Galo down by the upper strap of his sleeve, “Or did you _want_ something to position those hips onto?”

Face blooming into a red mess, Galo covers his eyes and screams, running around in circles and chanting, “Pervert, pervert, PERVERT! You can’t say that at work, Lio! A firefighter can’t waste time being hot and bothered if there’s an emergency!”

“That never stopped the Burnish from starting emergencies.”

“UUUAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHH!”

“Keep it down you two,” Vice-captain Puguna scolds lightly as he’s followed by Heavy Machine Operator Truss and Ardebit, “We want to actually hear the alarm go off in case of a fire, and we’ve already determined it to be impossible to hear it over Galo.”

Gasping at the accusation, Galo pouts while Lio apologizes, “Yes, that was inappropriate. Please don’t blame Galo, it was entirely my fault, all punishment should be given to me, sir.”

“Hey!” Galo cuts in, “I’m the one that got you riled up, quit trying to be a scapegoat, Lio!”

“No one is getting in trouble,” the vice-captain sighs, “Fotia, you’re fine.”

“But-”

“Let it go Lio,” Ardebit advises, “Now let’s chill out and have lunch.”

“I…yes, of course.” He concedes.

“Good!” Heavy Machine Operator Truss declares. “Why don’t you eat with us, Twiggy?” He asks with a wide grin.

_“Boss, c’mon! Eat somethin’ with us!_

_“Gueira’s right, we managed a pretty good haul,_ _grab a bit.”_

I’m…fine…

_“Don’t lie to me! Meis! Get ‘im!”_

What, no!

_“Damn, Boss! You have bony little pits, I can feel ‘em through yer jacket!”_

This is completely unnecessary.

_“Not if it’s for you.”_

“…Apologies,” Lio says, “But I am afraid that I will decline your invitation, Heavy Machine Operator Truss.”

“You sure?” Ardebit asks.

“Yes, but I thank you, please enjoy your break.” He says as he walks out, Galo following.

Friendship…is not what he deserves.

He became too dependent on Gueira and Meis, relied too much on them, so much that he wasn’t able to think straight when they sent him away.

So much that he became irrational when they were separated, nearly going against his own beliefs, ones that he tried to teach them, adding “hypocrite” to the seemingly infinite list of flaws that he has.

He had lost people before, turned to ash in front of him, an endless cycle for years, a sad but certain fate, one he accepted. The thought of it happening to them, however…

He was too attached.

No wonder he failed them.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

“Lio hates us,” Varys moans, slumped dejectedly on the table.

“No he doesn’t,” Remi dismisses, “It’s more that he probably doesn’t trust us very much.”

“Well we did throw him in jail,” Lucia pipes up suddenly, sticking her head out of an air vent, the action not even fazing her coworkers at this point.

“Yeah,” Aina cuts in, “But that was months ago. And I drooped him in a lake to cool him down and uncovered a government conspiracy with him, so we should at least be on a first-name basis by now!”

“At least he quit calling you ‘Captain,’” Varys tries to appease her, “The rest of us aren’t that lucky!”

“It is strange he still addresses us so formally,” Remi hums, “Usually that stops after the first month here.”

“It’s annoying,” Aina says in a huff, “Is it so hard to just say ‘Aina?!’”

“Speak for yourself,” Lucia starts as she settles into a seat, crossing her arms behind her head and grinning wide, “I _love_ being Dr. Fex!”

“Wait,” Varys suddenly says, “You’re not a doctor.”

“What Lio doesn’t know won’t hurt him.”

“But-” Remi tries to interject.

“Shhh, shhsh, shh.” Lucia cuts him off, pressing a finger to his lips.

“…”

Sighing, Aina muses, “That guy has some serious walls built up.”

“Well it doesn’t get in the way of work,” Remi adds, “But it is a little worrying.”

“Welp,” Lucia cuts in, “Some people just have a hard time trying to get over thinking the whole world’s out to get them. I’m sure he’ll come out of his shell someday.”

“Easy for you to say,” Aina bites, “After Galo, he likes you the most.”

“What can I say?” Lucia says smugly, “I’m universally appealing!”

_Whack!_

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

“You really need to begin making smaller portions when preparing food for others,” Lio advises as they eat in the firetruck.

“No,” Galo denies, “ _You_ need to start eating more so your stomach can get used to handling more food and you can get some meat on you!”

“That’s…unnecessary, you don’t need to concern yourself so much with my eating habits.”

Crossing his arms with a scolding look, Galo asks, “How much did the scale say you weighed?”

“Eighty-four pounds.” He responds quickly.

“So _what_ does that make your BMI?”

“15.4.”

“And how low does it have to be to get hospitalized?”

“…”

“Weeeeell?”

“…Underneath fifteen.”

“Mmhmm! So eat that sandwich! I’m getting you healthy, and you’re gonna like it!”

Deciding to listen (more accurately, get Galo to quit nagging) he resumes eating his lunch, adding, “I consider my health to be fine if I’m still alive at the end of the day.”

Pulling at his hair in frustration, Galo squeals, “That kind of thinking is gonna kill you! You need to take better care of yourself or your body’s just gonna quit one day! The Promare’s not here to save you anymore!”

“Thank you for stating the obvious Galo Thymos,” Lio shoots back with a bit too much bite to be his usual brand of sarcasm, “I would never have figured out how weak I am now by myself, truly thank you.”

Seeing how he’s struck a nerve, Galo’s face turns from frustrated to remorseful. Attempting to defuse the situation, he begins, “I’m sorry, I know you don’t like thinking about it, but…” he pauses, looking into Lio’s eyes, “You have a chance to have a healthy lifestyle now and I want you to enjoy it, I want you to enjoy the life you have now. I know it’s hard after everything you went through, and I’m not saying you have to be all better right now, but you gotta try Lio. Just a little?” He pleads softly, those accursed puppy dog eyes destroying whatever arguments Lio can form before he can say them.

“…It shouldn’t be like this.” Lio eventually remarks, not looking at Galo, “I should be capable of caring for myself, I was able to care for the others semi-decently.” Meeting Galo’s gaze, he acknowledges, “I should be taking care of you, I shouldn’t be so dependent.”

He’s the one who should be looking after Galo, Galo was hurt just as much as the Burnish, he shouldn’t focus all his energy on Lio.

It’s Lio’s responsibility to defend those he cares for.

It always has been.

He’s known this since he began his life as a Burnish, that day he destroyed that lab and the others came to him. Words weren’t needed, he was stronger than the rest of them, that was understood. Men, women, children and elders flocked to him, ready for his guidance, entrusted him with their safety. Thinking back now, it must have been a sight, an eight-year old destroying an entire Foresight facility in a single flare.

That was the day he became the protector of the Burnish, the one responsible for guiding them to a better future.

And he failed.

“Lio,” Galo cuts into Lio’s thinking, “It’s not all on you to make sure everything’s okay. We’re in this together, dude.”

“Even so,” Lio tries to argue, “You shouldn’t waste your time on me, I’ll be fine.”

Sighing loudly, slapping a hand over his eyes, Galo moans, “Uggghhhh…I swear, everything I say to you goes in one ear and out the other! You’re so stubborn!”

“Well isn’t that the pot calling the kettle black. How hypocritical of you, Galo Thymos.”

“…Taking care of you isn’t a waste of time,” Galo says after a pause, “You deserve to have someone help you like you helped the Burnish.”

“…I disagree.”

“Of course you do,” Galo says in an oddly jaded tone, “I’ve only known you for like three months and I get headaches ten times more a week than I usually have a year.” Sighing, he mumbles, “How did Gueira and Meis handle you?”

Quickly getting to his feet, Lio starts powerwalking out of the truck, sandwich left half-eaten.

“Lio?!” Galo jolts to full alertness. “What’s wrong?! What’d I say?!” Eyes widening, he gets up and asks, “What’s going on with Gueira and Meis?! Did something happen with you guys?!”

_SLAM!_

Shutting the door behind him, Lio heads out to the bathroom.

Gripping the sink, he tries to get a hold of himself, attempting to ignore the intrusive thoughts that surround his mind.

_They believed in you, and you failed them._

_They looked after you, cared for you and you almost got them killed._

_They were the closest thing you’ve ever had to friends and you destroyed everything they worked for._

_Friendship was not something you could afford._

_You were a leader, to give extra value to the lives of a select few would compromise your rationality._

_You were stronger than them, you were their protector, that was your purpose._

_You had no right to fraternize with them, but you did it anyway._

_And you singlehandedly ruined everything for them._

Looking into the mirror, he practices his breathing while he hears Galo tearing up the station looking for him.

He came to them as a guide.

He tried to show them a better way.

He failed and became the very thing he taught against.

No wonder Gueira and Meis probably hate him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for taking so long to update, I was very busy last month! I hope to update more frequently now, so please keep an eye out for this story!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The love we have for those we see as above us can be taken at any moment by one action, no matter the reasons. Saving the world just isn't enough sometimes to meet everyone's expectations.

Just as Lio’s managed to keep himself from having a panic attack, the siren goes off.

_Waaaaaahhhhhhhhh! Waaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!_

Lifting himself up from the sink, hobbling to the door, he takes a breath before opening it, coming face-to-face with an about-to-knock Galo.

Tripping, the floored Galo sends a stern glare up at Lio.

“You need to talk about it.”

Staring for a second, Lio doesn’t give an answer before he helps Galo to his feet and they rush off to the truck.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

“Burning Rescue!” The captain calls out, fist at the ready.

“DISPATCH!” The five firefighters and mascot chant as they meet his fist.

…

“Lio?” Galo calls out to the one at the side, “Come on, we’re-”

“Galo! Move!” The captain calls out as they board the truck.

“…Got it.” He mutters as he watches Lio disappear inside.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

_Waaaaaahhhhhh! Waaaaaahhhhh!_

Driving down the road at blazing speed, the others quickly detect the friction between Galo and Lio.

“…”

“…”

Who are looking everywhere but at each other, one looking to be made of stone the other pouting with crossed arms and a rapidly tapping foot.

“…”

While sitting next to each other.

“Is everything alright you guys?” Aina asks hesitantly.

“Yes.” “No!” The two answer at the same time.

“…”

“Galo,” Lio starts in a dismissive tone, still looking straight ahead, “There is no need to involve others in your personal issues.”

“Well if I don’t,” Galo bites back, eyes glued to the front, “Then they’re gonna eat me up inside and I’ll explode on people who don’t deserve it and feel bad about it because I was too much of a stubborn jerkface to ask for help!”

“You’re not even trying to be subtle.”

“SUBTLETY IS FOR THE WEAK!” Galo exclaims as he whips his head to face a still looking forward Lio, “A real man gets to the point and burns all uncertainty to nothing! So you need-”

_BAM!_

“Save your lover’s spat for the ride back,” Captain Ex scolds. Turning his head to Dr. Fex he asks, “How’s it looking Lucia?”

“Looks like it’s spread across the whole building,” she answers quickly, “The support beams aren’t gonna hold for much longer!”

“Okay,” the captain begins once they park, “Remi, take Galo and start looking for any trapped patients or workers; Varys, keep the ceiling from caving in as long as you can while Aina gets them to safety.”

“Understood.” “Got it!” “On the way!” “Moving out.”

As they rush out to their respective machines, Dr. Fex focuses on the screen she’s situated in front of and the captain begins to walk out while Lio just…is there.

Useless.

A burden, if anything.

~~Nothing new.~~

“Sir?” He blurts out, gaining the captain’s attention, “Is there some way I can assist with the situation?”

Regarding the smaller for a second, the captain eventually says, “Help Lucia keep an eye on where the flames are spreading and see if you can figure out the origin point.”

Frustration building up at being kept back yet again, he begins to argue, “I can do more than wait around while there are people in danger, sir, there is no need-”

“To keep you from getting in the way?” The captain interrupts, giving him a pointed look, “Right now, all you can do is give support and help us find a route to evacuate civilians; running in there and giving someone else to worry about saving is just going to waste time or get somebody hurt.”

“I am _not_ useless.” Lio grits out.

“You’re not fireproof anymore either.” The captain shoots back.

Eyes widening, Lio shrinks back a little as the captain heads out.

That’s right.

He can’t do anything.

“Eh,” Dr. Fex grunts, shocking him back into consciousness, “Don’t take it so hard, he just doesn’t want you running in and burning your pretty lashes off.”

“Vinny!” The rat agrees from the console.

“…I suppose.”

“Alright, quit your brooding, Cabbage Head!” The scientist admonishes, “You’re a part of the Sit-Down Squad now, and we have to keep these losers from burning up! So take a seat and let’s get workin’!”

Looking out at the fire one more time, Lio moves to sit beside her.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

“Alright,” Lucia calls into the coms, “Remi, take a left! Galo, head under that staircase!”

“Vinny!” The rat calls out as he shakes a bottle of breath spray.

“Lio, ignore him! Initiation to the Sit-Down Squad is _not_ a dinner date with Vinny!”

“Vinny!” Said mascot growls.

 _“Vinny back off!”_ Galo calls from his suit, _“Lio’s already seeing someone who loves him very much, find your own boyfriend!”_

 _“Galo…”_ Heavy Machine Operator Truss answers, _“Are you…legitimately threatened by Vinny?”_

“That is either really respectful,” Dr. Fex notes plainly, “Or really insecure.”

 _“I DON’T KNOW THE MEANING OF THAT WORD!”_ Galo roars.

 _“Focus people.”_ The captain orders. _“Have you found the source Lucia?”_

“Nothing yet,” the girl grumbles, “Thirty minutes and all I’ve found is a way to the roof and…oh! Hey! I found half a sandwich!” She drawls cynically. “This totally makes up for everyone burning alive!”

“Vinny!” The rat exclaims, admonishing her negativity while reaching for the sandwich.

 _“Come on Lucia, don’t give up!”_ Galo tries to motivate, _“We can do this, it’s what we’re here for! And Vinny, that’s Lio’s sandwich, get your own!”_

While the team yells back and forth at each other over the coms, Lio tries to decipher what he sees on the screen.

_Wait…_

_Is that…_

“They need to go to the northeast corridor.” He finally says softly.

“Huh?” Lucia gets out.

“That’s where the source is, the heat signature’s smaller to ward off suspicion, the larger fires are a decoy.”

“‘Decoy?’” Dr. Fex repeats, head turned away from communications, “You think someone did this on purpose?”

“Yes.”

He knows.

“Okay,” Lucia agrees, turning back to the screen, “Head northeast, guys, Lio thinks the source is there.”

_“Got it!” “Understood!”_

“So…” Lucia says after a brief silence, coms covered, “You wanna tell the class what’s up? Or do I need to let them know?”

He’s the reason this happened.

“That information is unnecessary.”

No one should be punished for something he was responsible for.

“Uh, what?!” Dr. Fex squawks. “If you’re keeping info from us, you know what’ll happen!” Lifting up a finger for each consequence, she begins, “Report to the cops, parole failed, court, back to prison!”

“I am aware and I am prepared to face the consequences.”

“Vinny!” The rat says, trying to placate them.

“…You’re protecting someone, aren’t you?” Dr. Fex says, unusually somber.

Defiant, he tells her, “I will not give you an answer.”

He will not fail his people again.

“You don’t need to.”

Whipping their heads to see the captain, their eyes widen at the person he’s got in a death grip.

“Got the perp.”

 _“What the hell?!”_ They hear Galo yell over the link. _“There’s a shit-ton of lighter fluid in here!”_

 _“I’ve been seeing those all over the hospice,”_ the vice-captain responds, _“I’m suspecting arsonry!”_

That’s the correct assumption.

Lio knows.

He’s the one who developed that strategy after all.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

“So this guy,” Ardebit says once the situation is under control, “Was in Mad Burnish?”

Glaring at the pressing looks from Dr. Fex and the captain, Lio returns his face to it’s neutral position and answers, “Yes, and I developed the tactic he used to start the fire; we utilized it for when we needed to distract from one main target by having others cause larger distractions.”

“That’s why you knew where to look…” Vice-captain Puguna says to himself, eyes widening slightly.

“At any rate,” the captain interrupts, “I contacted the authorities, they should be here soon.”

“Please,” Lio pleads, “My people are confused and scared of this world I’ve led them into, and I’m the one who taught him how to do this, so if anyone deserves punishment, then it is me.”

“That doesn’t make sense Lio!” Galo interrupts, stomping into Lio’s space, “If people did things like that, then bank robbers would get off scot-free because they’d just blame the guy who made guns! It’s not your fault and you know it!”

“Yeah,” Ardebit agrees, “Just because you teach someone something doesn’t mean you’re responsible for how they use it! And there are plenty of Burnish that _aren’t_ burning down hospices that were treating _other_ Burnish!” She spits, glaring at the accused.

“It’s better than living like this…” The man in handcuffs mumbles, staring at the ground, “Ashes…Being ash is preferable…”

Looking at him softly, Lio pleads again, “At least allow me to speak to him.”

Giving Lio a nod, the captain moves to the side as Lio approaches the man.

Kneeling, he begins, “I know, this new world is frightening, and you may wish that we became ash instead of learning to live with those that persecuted us for so long, but we musn’t allow ourselves to be consumed by these dark desires. Our brothers and sisters don’t need to die to be free, what they need is patience and support while they attempt to embrace this time of peace. I am sorry if you were not given enough, but I promise you, things will improve.” Placing a hand on his shoulder, Lio softly says, “Please, allow me to help you.”

He pulls his hand back with a gasp after the man bites it.

“HEY!” Galo screams while the others try to hold him back.

“Get over yourself,” the Burnish tells him, being restrained by Heavy Machine Operator Truss, “You think you can win me over with all your pretty words like you did with Gueira and Meis? Huh? Well look where it got us!” Laughing hysterically at the shock on Lio’s face, he continues, “How many of us died because we followed your stupid plans?! Huh?! You let a rat in, and we all nearly got grinded by those fucking scientists because you didn’t have the balls to actually do something! And then you took the flames away and left us at the mercy of this shitty city! How are we supposed to protect ourselves now?!”

“If he didn’t do that,” Ardebit buts in, “Then the world would have ended, Lio didn’t have a choice!”

“It’s what you deserved!” The Burnish shoots back, “It’s what all you bastards deserve for throwing us to the side and hunting us down so that bastard could make us his guinea pigs!” Turning to look directly at Lio, tears streaming down his eyes, he starts, “It’s what _you_ deserve. So many of us have starved, slept in the streets and been treated like freaks. All we had were the flames. And you took them away.”

Chuckling, he adds, “And what do you get? Nice new home, cushy job workin’ for the people who screwed us over and a fuckin’ boytoy!” Glaring, he continues, “You are a disgrace to Burnish everywhere. You’re defiling the memory of everyone who had to suffer for something we didn’t ask for and you don’t even care. Why did they have to die, and why do you get to keep living?!”

_WHAM!_

Galo’s fist gets the man out cold.

Looking at the unconscious form Varys lifts from the ground with a calm face save for slightly squinted eyes, Galo says in a quiet but cold voice, “Shut. Up.”

Eyes wide, the squad regards Galo with faces of shock and apprehension.

Turning to Lio, he holds a hand out to lift him up.

Without hesitation, he takes it.

“Truck,” Galo tells him, “He broke the skin on your hand, we need to fix it.”

“It’s not that-” Lio tries to argue.

“ _Now_.”

Hearing the rarely used authority in Galo’s voice, Lio’s sense of survival decides not to push it and marches him back to the truck.

He is a traitor.

It’s not fair that he’s given such luxury after so many more deserving Burnish found no peace on Earth.

He can’t give his people what they deserve, and while they suffer he thrives.

He’d trade it if he could.

But he can’t.

His comfortable life is built on the ashes of those who lived in agony.

He really is just like Foresight.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

As the police take the Burnish into custody, the other squad members stare in slight fear at their rookie.

“…Galo?” Aina eventually asks, hesitantly.

“…Oh shit! I’m getting a write-up for this aren’t I?!” Galo says in a panicked tone, grabbing the sides of his head.

“…”

“AAAAAGGGGHHHH!” He moans, pulling at his hair as he paces, “I’ve only been a firefighter for a year and I’m getting written up! What the hell, Thymos?! You can’t just punch arsonists if they’re already subdued, idiot!”

“…”

“No!” He says as he shoots up straight. “A real man must always face the consequences of his actions with dignity!” Turning to an unfazed Ignis, he continues, “Chief, I apologize for my actions and will take my punishment without complaint!”

“Just get in the truck.” Ignis dismisses.

“But sir-!”

“I’ll punish you after we get the paperwork sorted, now march.”

“Sir, yes sir!” He salutes with a smile before rushing back to the truck.

“…Startin’ to think he might have some demons holed up in his mohawk.” Lucia says bluntly.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

“…And there!” Galo cheers once he finishes disinfecting the wound while they’re alone in the firetruck, “All better! Now we just wrap it up…” He remarks as he does the action, “…And boom! You’re good to go, Lio!”

“I’m sorry.” Lio tells him.

“Hah?” Galo grunts with a slack jaw and wide eyes, “What are you sorry for?”

“I shouldn’t have left myself vulnerable to an attack, and now you’re wasting resources on me.” Keeping his face calm as he turns to look Galo in the eyes, he continues, “And that Burnish was able to do those things because I taught him how. And now you’re going to be punished because I wasn’t paying close enough attention to-”

“Okay, stop.”

Eyes widening at Galo cutting him off, he opens his mouth to object before Galo continues, “I know this is hard for you to believe, but not every single thing that happens to anyone is your fault.” Holding up a finger with closed eyes and furrowed eyebrows, he lists off, “I’m getting in trouble because of something _I_ chose to do. That guy is going to be punished because of something _he_ chose to do. All you did was try to help someone keep from getting in trouble, so yeah, that’s the one thing you’re guilty of. Nothing more, nothing less.”

“Even so,” Lio tries to argue, “He was only pushed to that point because I haven’t helped my people enough and you only attacked him because I was being careless.”

“Being a Burnish isn’t an excuse.”

Going silent at Galo’s declaration, Lio finds himself momentarily stunned.

“He may have suffered,” Galo says seriously, “But that doesn’t give him the right to hurt other people. That’s what you told Mad Burnish, so you know somewhere in that self-deprecating head of yours that I’m right.” Face softening, he adds in a gentler tone, stopping himself when he goes to put a hand on Lio’s arm, “It didn’t give him the right to hurt you.”

“…You didn’t need to hit him.”

“ _That_ ,” Galo follows up with a smirk, “Was me keeping a promise; I told you I’d take care of the haters!”

“I thought that was for anti-Burnish sentiment.” Lio snarks, regaining a bit of his sharp tongue.

“It was,” Galo responds cheekily, “But then it turned into anyone screwing you over.”

“Aren’t I special?” Lio chuckles, smirking slightly.

“I’d do it for anyone,” Galo clarifies, “But I just happen to be around you most the time.”

“Is that a problem?”

“Nope!”

Rolling his eyes, Lio feels a small bit of the tension subside.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

At the station, Lio and Galo sit a distance away from where they know where the others are watching them.

“C’mon,” Galo eggs him on, “You promised me you’d finish it when we got back!”

Lifting the sandwich closer to his mouth, Lio narrows his eyes at it and retorts, “I agreed to finish the sandwich, I never said when.”

“Lioooooo!” Galo whines.

“I will finish it later, I am not hungry at the moment.”

“You need to stop making stashes,” Galo grumbles, “You’re always gonna have food ready, so you don’t have to be ready to haul ass and get on the move anymore.”

“We’ll see how long that lasts.”

“Rest of your life sound good?”

Chuckling slightly, Lio’s smile falls as his gaze returns to his food.

“I’m really…”

_Children, adults, elderly starving, turning to ashes once they fell down and couldn't get up._

_And now he gets homecooked meals for free._

“…not hungry.”

_Does justice exist?_

Sighing, Galo acquiesces, “If you’re really not hungry, you don’t have to finish it, but you shouldn’t starve yourself because you feel guilty.”

“…”

“You don’t have to suffer in solidarity, you deserve food. Don’t let what that guy said get to you.”

“You keep saying that.”

“Well you could try listening.”

While they sit in silence for a bit, Galo holds his hand out, the question understood.

Lio slips his in, and they clutch.

For five seconds before Lio can get lost in his head and confuse Galo’s hand for an ice block.

It’s miserable for him, but he keeps telling Lio it’s enough.

It’s not.

_Fwip!_

And a set of clothes are thrown in his direction, Galo intercepting them with his face.

“Touchdown!” He calls out.

“That was a catch Galo,” Ardebit corrects as she and Captain Ex approach.

“Go shower then get changed,” the older man orders to Lio.

“Why?” Lio asks, eyes narrowing.

“There’s a meeting tonight with some officials helping with Burnish reintegration; there’s going to be some Burnish there trying to explain what they need, and I figured you could help with that.”

“I dunno,” Galo cuts in, “Lio’s been through alot today, maybe we should-”

“I’ll go.”

Turning their heads to Lio as he sits up, the man collects the clothes from Galo’s face.

“You sure?” Galo asks with a concerned look on his face, “I can come with you, if you want. I know you don’t like rubbin’ elbows with rich folk.”

“Yes,” Lio answers, “I’ll be fine, you don’t need to worry.”

And with that, he’s off to the shower.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

“Are you guys planning something?” Galo asks with a raised eyebrow.

“Don’t look at me,” Aina deflects, “The captain just told me to give Lio something nice to wear out of my closet, since the only thing he seems to own besides his uniform are his pants. That he’s been wearing everyday for months now.”

“Hey! I gave him a sweatshirt to wear around the apartment!”

“Take the man shopping already, damn it!”

“I tried! He keeps telling me not to spend money on him!”

“Do it anyway!”

While the two bicker, Ignis walks off to make a call.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

For the first time in a while, Lio actually accomplished something.

His people are eager to see him, and he patiently hears their woes, makes necessary arguments, prevents their needs from being shot down by self-absorbed corporate sell souls more concerned with public relations than actually being decent humans.

His voice doesn’t waver, he is strong but does not allow himself to be caught up in emotion while he fights with his words. Not even being monitored by the captain, from an admittedly respectful distance, makes him feel inadequate, not allowing himself to think of why he’s not allowed to go anywhere by himself anymore; this cage will not hold his voice.

His people look at him in awe.

Once again, he is the defender of the oppressed.

It’s fun to pretend he’s still capable of doing something.

“Mr. Fotia?”

Turning around, he finds…someone smaller than he is.

“Is there something I can help you with?” He asks.

The woman, petite, barely any taller than Dr. Fex, with plum hair in a pixie haircut and kind blue eyes to complement her fair skin, shakes her head slightly with a small smile before holding out her hand and saying, “No, my name is Iris Bievve, I’m a psychologist commissioned by the city with helping the new Burnish citizens recover from the trauma they’ve endured.”

Taking her hand and shaking it, Lio responds, “I see, thank you for helping my people, I know that providing them aid is not an easy task; I truly appreciate your efforts.”

Shaking her head as she pulls her hand back, she deflects, “I’m just doing my part to make up for the city’s mistakes, nothing special.”

“Not many would offer us aid, and even less would do so without it benefitting themselves, so I find your efforts to be much more impactful than you say.”

Chuckling, the woman says, “What your followers said is true: kind, charismatic, someone you’d follow instinctively.” Glancing out at the crowd with a gentle smile as she regards the goers, she adds, “They hold you in such a high respect, you must have truly made an impact on them.”

“I suppose.”

_I got them captured._

_I got them killed._

_I failed them._

“Though,” the doctor interrupts his spiraling thoughts as she turns back to him with a neutral expression, “I can’t imagine it was easy for you, to constantly care and protect them, especially now that you have all been given the chance to re-enter society. Many of my patients expressed the belief that they may have relied too heavily on you.”

They’re wrong.

He didn’t do enough, and his people suffered for it.

Defending them is his purpose in life, there is no reason for his people to feel as though they have asked too much of him.

“That concern is unwarranted,” he answers her, “I would gladly pay any price to ensure that the Burnish have every chance at a safe and happy life. My only concern now is how I can make this time of peace bearable for them.”

“Very noble,” Dr. Bievve remarks, “But at the moment, I’m more interested in how _you’re_ adjusting to all of this.” Looking directly into his slightly widened eyes, she adds, “If you feel as though you would like to speak about everything that happened, I could see you.”

_You don’t need to do that._

_My people are suffering, they need you much more than I do._

_I have no right to this, the life I live now is one of undeserved ease._

“I appreciate your offer,” He tells her, “But I don’t believe that it is necessary. I’m doing well, I would prefer you focus on those that truly require your assistance.”

Nodding, the woman reaches into a pocket and hands out a slip of paper. “Even so, I would like you to take this and contact me if you change your mind.”

Taking the offered card, he thanks her, “I appreciate your efforts, but I don’t believe that I am in particular need for counseling. I thank you, though.”

_You have nothing to complain about._

_You were stronger, you were meant to take the pain and the burden away from the others, and you failed._

_Your people are scared because you couldn’t do anything right._

_Whatever pain you felt means nothing._

_The flames are gone because of you._

_The world is cold because of you._

With that, he bids the woman farewell and begins to look for the captain.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A leader must take charge; Ignis and Lio disagree on how far one must go.

“So what was your motivation?” Lio asks as the captain drives him home.

Deciding not to play dumb, the older man begins, “I figured you needed to see how your people appreciate what you do after what happened; you’re doing plenty of good, you don’t need to beat yourself up over what one person said to you.”

“That man suffered because of my actions or lack thereof,” Lio retorts, anger rising in his voice, “I am responsible for the Burnish, if they feel as though death is a better alternative to living as we do now, then it is because of my failing to help them.”

_A traitor._

_Not a leader._

_A failure._

Pulling into the parking lot of Galo’s apartment complex the captain is quiet for a moment while keeping the car on.

“Alright,” the older man begins, “There’s something you need to understand.”

Raising an eyebrow, Lio questions, “And that would be?”

“I’ve been with the department for quite a few many years,” the man starts, “And for all these years, Varys is the only member of my original squad still in the force. Everyone else is dead or physically unable to keep working. If not, then one day they just couldn’t handle it anymore.”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” Lio says after a pause, “They shouldn’t have suffered.”

“I know,” the captain agrees, “And I know, it never gets easier losing people, people you were responsible for, people that trusted you to keep them safe. But I know other things.

“I know that it’s tempting, the idea of blaming yourself for every little thing that goes wrong. You’re the leader, every mistake is on you. And once you start thinking like that, it’s hard to get out of it.”

“Flames are wild,” Lio offers, “You can never truly know what they desire, where they will go. It would be impossible to plan against them, sir. There is no point in blaming yourself.”

“I know, so why do you do it?”

Stunned, Lio look at the man in shock.

“You can never have absolute certainty your plans are gonna work out, you just can’t. Something will go wrong and someone can get hurt. There’s something you won’t see coming, and through no fault of your own, things happen.

“But you can’t just blame yourself whenever something goes wrong. I did that for a long time, and it didn’t end well. Adding a problem like that to everything else you’re going through is just going to push you into a breakdown, and you don’t need that.”

“I am not being irrational,” Lio shoots back, “The Burnish are my responsibility, and I will not avoid the repercussions of my failure to keep them safe or to guide them in the right direction.”

“I understand,” the man tries to pacify him, “But there’s a difference between taking responsibility and making yourself a scapegoat. It’s easy to lose yourself in that line of thinking, and I can tell you got lost a long time ago. But what happened today wasn’t your fault. What happened to your people while you were on the run wasn’t your fault. What’s going on with them now isn’t your fault. You did everything you could, but some things were just out of your control.” Gracing the smaller with an uncharacteristically gentle look, the captain concludes, “It’s time for you to start forgiving yourself.”

“…You don’t understand.” Lio grits out, fists clenched, staring at his lap.

Raising an eyebrow at him, the captain tries to continue, “Leadership is a heavy burden, and if you keep adding more pressure to it, you’re going to collapse. You need-”

“I’m not like you,” Lio cuts in, facing the captain with a glare, “You chose to have your position, protecting my people is the purpose of my life. This responsibility was decided to go to me when I awakened, and it will be my burden until the day I die. I was born to guide the Burnish, my destiny is to guard them as we search for peace. If anyone perishes it is because I failed to save them and if they fall onto a path that brings harm to others it is because I could not provide them the support that they need. My life belongs to my people, and it shall remain that way. You know nothing.”

“…Who told you that?”

Eyes widening at the question, Lio says nothing in shock.

“Who decided it was your responsibility?” The captain asks, “How long has it been your responsibility?”

“…”

“Did you even come up with that yourself?” The man continues, softly, empathetically.

“That is not-”

“Is this why you can’t just let yourself be a human being?”

_“You are a special child.”_

_“He’s so powerful.”_

_“He’s the one we’ve been waiting for.”_

I’m…scared…

_“You…you are the hope we’ve needed for so long…”_

_“Those flames…immaculate…”_

I want to go home.

_“Child, you are the one who will guide us.”_

But…

_“You are the only hope that we have.”_

_“Please…”_

_“…tia…_ Lio _!”_

Gasping, Lio tries to suck in a breath, vaguely hearing the captain trying to give him instructions.

“Focus on where you’re at,” the man calmly orders, “Can you hear me?”

“ _*pant…*pant*...”_

“You don’t have to say anything, just nod if you can.”

Obeying, Lio nods.

“Good. Now we’re going to focus on our surroundings, okay?”

Nodding, Lio manages to say, “Y…Yes.”

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Once Lio manages to regain full awareness, the guilt of allowing himself to be defeated by his own mind quickly makes itself known.

“I..I apologize,” Lio starts, “I had no intentions of wasting your time.”

Giving him a concerned look, the man says, “You had a panic attack.”

“It was…for ridiculous reasons.”

Narrowing his eyes before releasing a sigh and calming himself down, Captain Ex tries again, “If it affected you that much, then it’s not ridiculous.”

“I cannot afford to let myself be held back by what has already passed,” Lio says, as much to himself as the captain, “I need to focus.”

“You can’t focus on something new until you make peace with what’s already happened.”

“What do you know?” Lio accuses sharply.

“I know that you were given too much responsibility, and now you can’t deal with separating your life from your people. No matter how much you need to start moving away from the Burnish.”

“Are you insane?!” Lio yells, control lost as the thought of his people left without him to defend them is entered into his mind, “The Burnish are weakened and scared, they need me.”

“Yes, but now they have more than you. You need to take some time for yourself and heal from everything that happened to you.”

“My people cannot wait for me to finish wasting my time dealing with miniscule inconveniences!”

“Listen to me,” The captain just about growls, “You are going to explode if you keep putting yourself under all these unrealistic expectations. If you keep going like this, you’re going to give everything away until there’s nothing left of you.”

“My entire being is for the Burnish.” Gritting his teeth, he concludes, “If it will ensure their lives, I will happily explode and leave my remains for all those that need them to collect.”

“…I’m sorry you were forced to live under so much pressure,” Captain Ex says in a remorseful tone, “I’m sorry that your people unintentionally used you up so badly.”

_WHAM!_

Slamming the passenger door open, Lio storms out of the captain’s car, walking quickly and furiously to the stairs of Galo’s apartment complex.

It was an honor.

_I want to go home!_

He had the power to protect his people, he should be grateful.

_I don’t want to be a monster!_

No sacrifice was too large, he would never leave the Burnish at the mercy of those who would do them harm.

_I don’t want to live like this!_

Everything about him, he will give.

_I don’t know!_

If his people suffer, then it is because he has failed.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Walking in, he sees Galo asleep on the couch, sitting up, arms crossed, drooling.

The sight turns his mouth up slightly.

He sure is a stubborn one, still trying to play this game.

_“I’m not letting you sleep on the couch Lio!”_

Galo, I will be fine, I will not take your bed from you.

_“You’re not taking it, I’m giving it to you!” Jabbing a finger in Lio’s direction, he continues, “It’s time for you to start having a good night’s sleep! No more hard surfaces, you’re getting a bed and soft pillows!”_

Galo, that’s unnecessary, and I don’t sleep as often as you so your argument is even more pointless.

_“You need to sleep more! Your body needs to relax.”_

Galo, I will not.

_“Fine! Then I’m just gonna stay right here! Now you have no choice!”_

This little game has been going on since Lio came to reside here.

At some point in the night, Galo will sit himself on the couch and refuse to leave so that Lio will take the bed. Unfortunately for him, the lack of stimulation fails to keep him awake, so when he inevitably falls asleep, Lio can easily take him to his bed.

It’s better than the nights that he doesn’t try.

Where they’re too wrapped up in each other to care about anything else, skin hitting skin, sweat glistening on their bodies, pleasure filling the air.

Then Lio leaves and Galo cries himself to sleep when Lio refuses to stay.

Galo’s silent when he cries, but Lio knows what’s happening.

Galo refuses to make him stay, but it kills him all the same.

Lifting Galo into his arms in the style of the blushing bride he fantasizes about making the mohawked man into one day, he feels Galo lean into him unconsciously.

“…nnn…Lio…”

The spasm of warmth that shoots throughout his body isn’t enough to wake Galo.

Pulling the sheets back, Lio lays Galo down and dresses him for bed before covering him up with the bedding.

Pausing for a second as he gets up, he places a kiss on Galo’s forehead.

Galo needs more.

Turning, he heads back to the living room to see what work he can find.

The Burnish need more.

The failure will make himself useful.

No more of his people will be led astray because of his incompetence.

He will give all that he has, to ensure a bright future.

And then, Lio will give more.

It is his destiny.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was originally going to be the ending to Chapter 3, hence why the two were released so closely together, but I felt that Chapter 3 was running too long, so this one became it's own small chapter.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Every now and then, Lio actually has a nice day where he can't focus on hating himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I believe that the dark tone of this fic can be quite draining, so I made this chapter as a small break! Hopefully it will lighten the mood! I also just had the strangest desire to make Burning Rescue go apple picking.

There was another fire today.

It was small though, only scorching a small side of a wall on the barn before it was extinguished but the owners insisted on paying them back and letting them pick what they wanted from the apple orchard.

Small flames like the ones that the others would create makes him feel like what he thinks home is.

“Lio!” Galo calls out, snapping Lio out of his trance. “How many you got?!”

“Hm?” Lio mumbles as he meets Galo’s eyes once the other man finishes running over to him. “Oh, I haven’t been collecting any.”

“What?!” Galo yells out in disbelief, “Why?!”

“I just don’t see any purpose in this, there is no need for these people to give up their livelihood to give thanks, the duty of the fire department is to help those in crisis. Repayment is unnecessary.”

“Says the guy who scrubs the station every Thursday by himself because we got him a hair tie,” Vice-captain Puguna snarks as he carries a crate to the truck.

“I don’t see-”

“Or maybe you just can’t do it,” Galo says obnoxiously, a smirk on his face.

“…Excuse me?”

“I guess it’s just one of the many things I’m better than you at!” Closing his eyes and crossing his arms, he turns his head to the side with a “Hmph!”

“Galo…”

“Heh, you couldn’t catch up to me if you tried!”

“I understand that you are trying to manipulate me to play your game through reverse psychology,” Lio observes with a furrowed brow and a vein throbbing on his head, “And while I would normally be eager to prove my superiority over you, I am afraid that, while participating in an activity independent of it, we are currently on working hours, so your little contest will have to be postponed.” Turning around, he begins to walk back to the firetruck and wait for the others to finish.

“…Bawk.”

Lio stops dead in his tracks.

“…I’m sorry?” Lio asks, looking over his shoulder, sharpness emitting through his mouth and eyes.

“Bawk.” Galo repeats, a smug look on his face.

“Galo Thymos.” Lio warns as he turns back around, warning present in his voice, “I will give you one chance to cease this ridiculous taunting, or I will be forced to-”

“Bawk! Bawk-bawk bawk bawk baaaaawwwwwkkkkk!” Galo ignores as he begins to circle around Lio, flapping his arms like the arrogant rooster that he is.

Until Lio pulls him down by the sleeve strap to glare straight into his eyes and crash their foreheads together.

“If you are so insistent on being humiliated in front of your coworkers,” Lio hisses, “Then I suppose I will indulge you!”

“Oh really?” Galo mocks. “Hate to break it to you, but I’ve already got twenty-three!” He boasts, swinging his collection proudly. “Looks like you’re gonna have to do some serious catchup if you want to _dream_ of getting close to me!”

Growling, Lio asks, “The objective is to have the most apples collected before we leave, correct?”

“Yupperoo!”

“And we leave in thirty minutes, yes?”

“Bingo!”

“Fine.” Lio declares. “I accept your challenge.”

“Oh yeah!” Galo declares with a hip thrust once he pulls away. “It’s on, baby! The only things that’re gonna be redder than all the apples I’m gonna get are your chubby cheeks when I kick your ass!”

“How will that happen when I am already so far ahead of you?” Lio asks in false concern.

“Haah?” Galo sounds in confusion. “What’re you-”

Cutting him off, Lio pulls Galo down by the shoulders and quickly launches his knee into Galo’s gut.

“Gggyyuuuckkk!” Galo grunts as he falls to his knees, Lio stealing his basket from his loosened grip.

“It would appear I have twenty-three apples to your zero,” Lio remarks, “I am afraid that you will have to focus on collecting fruit quite seriously if you would like to dream of catching up to me.” And with that, Lio runs off.

Clutching his stomach, Galo glares at Lio’s retreating form.

“You little shit!” He yells as he begins to chase his lover.

“…And they’re off again.” Aina notes flatly.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

“It’s just an apple Varys,” Remi dismisses.

“Just an apple?!” The larger man yells in disbelief. “These are Northern Spy apples! Northern, _Spy_! Do you have _any_ idea how good these are for baking?!”

“As good as any other apple?” He asks with a shrug.

“…It is a sad life that you lead.” The other dismisses, shaking his head.

_Fwish!_

Turning their heads upwards towards the noise, they see-

“Fotia!” Remi calls out to the man who just landed onto a tree branch, “What are you doing up there?!”

“Collecting apples,” the man responds in his generally neutral tone, “Vice-captain Puguna.”

“Okay, why?!”

“…I believe I have just told you.” Lio says in confusion, an eyebrow raised.

“Why did you need to climb up that high?” Remi asks in exasperation, scrubbing a hand over his face.

“Why do you need to know?” Lio shoots back, defensively.

“Excuse me?” Remi says, affronted.

“Whatever I am doing is not a threat to your operation, so there is no need to be suspicious of my actions.”

“That’s not-! Tcchh…” Pinching his nose, Remi sighs before looking back up at Lio and saying, “I’m not suspicious, I’m just worried that you could hurt yourself by accident and I’d like to know why you’re risking your own safety.”

“…”

“We just don’t want you to fall down or get stuck!” Varys agrees, smiling. “So why don’t you come on down? You can help me figure out what I’m gonna make with all these apples!”

“…Make?” Lio asks in confusion.

"Yeah! I can make all sorts of stuff! Apple pie, apple cobbler, apple crumble, cinnamon apple muffins, apple cake, pork chops with apple sauce and-Ooh! Apple cider!”

“You can…make things with apples?”

“…What?”

“Have you…” Remi tries to begin. “Ever had any of those things before?”

“Not that I can recall.”

“…”

“…WAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!”

“Varys! What’s wrong?!”

“Heavy Machine Operator Truss! Did I say something that upset you?!”

“HOW IS YOUR LIFE THIS SAD?!!!!” The giant man cries, sobbing into his hands.

“I-”

_KSSSHHH!_

And Galo’s matoi breezes past Lio’s head and hooks itself onto the branch Lio’s on.

“There you are you little cheater!” Galo screams as he runs over to them.

“I apologize for disturbing you both,” Lio says as he shifts on the branch, “But I need to leave now, I will return when we begin to depart from here.” And Lio is running and jumping through the trees, away from Galo chasing him.

“Get back here and give me back my apples! You’re cheating!”

“You never said how the apples had to be obtained.” Lio defends as he continues to run away.

“I shouldn’t have needed to!”

…

“I keep forgetting that air of professionality is just a cover for Galo Part Two.” Remi remarks plainly.

“I am gonna make that boy so many snacks.” Varys sniffs.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

“Why couldn’t we save a taffy farm?” Lucia whines from where she picks apples atop the captain’s shoulders.

“That would be a candy factory Lucia,” the man remarks as he drops the apples into a crate.

“Well why couldn't we save one of those?!” She complains.

“Because there weren’t any on fire.” He answers.

“Hmm…”

“Lucia, no.”

“Vinny!” The rat scolds from atop her head.

“Geez!” The genius recoils, “I wasn’t being serious! Lay off!”

“…”

“Vinny…”

“…I’d evacuate it first.” Lucia pouts.

Before either can give her a tongue lashing, a flash of blue and shirtlessness comes barreling towards them.

“LUCIA!” Galo calls out. “CAPTAIN! VINNY! HAVE YOU SEEN LIO?!

“Not since we started doin’ things likes kids before fun did.” Lucia responds.

“Books were a thing.” The captain suggests.

“…”

“We haven’t seen him.” Ignis tells Galo.

“OKAY, THANK YOU AND ENJOY YOUR TIME!” Is yelled before Galo rushes off again.

“He’s gone.” Ignis calls out into the woods.

Lio steps out from a bush, eyes narrowed slightly as he asks, “How did you know I was here?”

“I have my ways.” The older man dismisses.

Approaching them, the shorter begins, “Thank you, and I apologize for my outburst last night.”

“It’s fine.” Ignis dismisses with his hand. “Just as long as you’re okay.”

“But I-”

“I’m not mad, alot happened to you yesterday.”

“…I…suppose, thank you.”

“…So,” Lucia starts, “What’s-a-goin’ on?”

“Just a little disagreement last night,” Ignis explains, “Nothing for you to worry about.”

“Got it,” she agrees. Turning her head to look at Lio, she tells him, “Don’t worry, here in the Sit-Down Squad, we mind our own business! Let your feelings out when you feel like it!”

“Vinny!” Vinny agrees, jumping down to nuzzle Lio’s ankles.

Lifting the rat into his hand, he scratches beneath the rat’s chin, his mouth lifting up slightly.

“THERE YOU ARE!”

As Galo comes rushing back towards them, Lio deposits Vinny back onto Lucia before leaving with a, “I will return within the next ten minutes to go back to the fire station.”

“BETRAYORS!” Galo screams as he passes the trio, tailing Lio.

“…”

“…”

“…”

“So, about the candy factory…”

_BAM!_

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

As Aina watches the two idiots, hands pushing against each other trying to obtain dominance, foreheads clashed, apple crates set aside, she swears she can feel her brain cells die.

“Stealing what your opponent already collected is cheap and dishonorable!” Galo declares.

“If I was worried about honor and fair play,” Lio shoots back, “I would have died long before I met you.”

“Well now it’s safe to have a sense of manly pride and justice!”

“A real man wouldn’t worry himself with something so trivial.”

“Why, you-!

Sighing, Aina sets down her bag and walks to stand between them, hands out and pulling Galo away from Lio.

“Okay!” She declares. “Break it up you two!”

“But he stole my apples!” Galo whines, pointing angrily at Lio.

“You guys live together, they’re all going to the same place!”

“IT’S THE PRINCIPLE!”

“What are you even going to do with all these?!”

“…Oh.”

“Why did I expect you to think about it?” Aina asks wearily.

“I was going to take my share to the children.” Lio pipes in.

“Dude!” Galo calls out with a smile on his face, “That’s a great idea!”

“You would have come to the same conclusion.” The smaller tries to downplay.

“Learn to take a compliment Lio,” Aina remarks.

 _“We’re moving, people!”_ They hear the captain call out.

“Alright,” Aina says as she moves and grabs her bag, “I’m heading back, if you two want to stay and knock each other’s brains out, be my guest.” With a wave, she begins the walk back to the truck.

“So,” Galo begins to say, “Should we count ‘em now or…”

“There is no point when I have clearly won.” Lio dismisses.

“Haah?” Galp grunts in confusion. “No you haven’t!”

“Well I have six crates filled with apples while you have zero so I believe I have.”

“What are you talking about, you don’t have-Wait a minute-”

The minute is declined in favor of Lio chopping the back of Galo’s head and running off with all of the apples.

“LIO!”

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

After the ride back, Lio asks, “Did you have any intention of actually winning, Galo Thymos?”

Jerking at being caught, Galo flushes before scratching his neck awkwardly and says with a brilliant smile, “Well, if you had fun, then I got everything I wanted!”

Cheeks warming slightly, Lio’s quiet at that blunt admission.

“I suppose,” he says after his brief pause, “It was a decent way to pass the time.”

“You mean it?!”

“Yes,” Lio says with a chuckle, “Except for your rooster acting.”

“C’mon, I was in the mood!”

“Well, I suppose it’s contagious, now I’m in the mood for some loud and proud large cock, thank you.”

Face erupting into a sea of red, Galo backs away and begins pacing with closed eyes and covered ears screaming, “PERVERT, PERVERT, PERVERT! LIO, YOU’RE DIRTY!”

Chuckling slightly, he hooks his pinky around Galo’s.

“Hmm?” Galo hums. “Lio?”

“That,” Lio starts, “Was nice.” Lips curling up ever so slightly, he finishes, “Thank you, Galo.”

Blinking his widened eyes in a daze, Galo regains his senses and returns Lio’s attempt at a smile with a warm, soft and gentle one of his own.

“No probs. Anything for you, man.”


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Galo and Lio are suspended; the next three days will be the storm Lio's been dreading to meet.

Getting called into the captain’s office was a predictable occurrence.

“Okay,” the older man sighs as he regards Lio and Galo, “You two, while having noble intentions, messed with an investigation concerning arson. So, I’m afraid you two are going to face punishment.”

“Yes,” Lio says solemnly, “I understand.”

Eyebrows furrowed and jaw clenched in an attempt to look mature, Galo yells with a salute, “YES SIR! I WILL TAKE MY PUNISHMENT LIKE A MAN, DO NOT TRY TO EASE IT AT ALL!”

“Okay,” The captain says unfazed, “You’re both suspended for three days.”

“But,” Lio interjects, “I’m a parolee, this should be counted-”

“I’ve already discussed it with the higher-ups,” The captain interrupts, “And they said that as the lead official in your probation that I had the final decision and I decided that you just need some time to clear your head.”

Noticing his discomfort, Galo briefly puts a hand on Lio’s shoulder for a comforting squeeze. After making sure Lio is aware of his intentions and watches him do it.

So Lio doesn’t fall into hysterics and add assault to his charges.

“Of course.” Lio responds, grateful for the mercy shown.

Now he can’t waste anyone’s time.

Now he won’t just be in the way if something happens.

“Yes!” Galo says, desperately trying stay positive.

“Good,” Captain Ex acknowledges with a nod, “Then I’ll see you two Friday.”

Nodding, the two leave the office.

There’s no real reason for the captain to keep him here.

The most logical choice of action would have been to let Lio return to prison.

He tried to keep information hidden.

He gave an arsonist the tools to start a fire.

He’s completely useless to the department, there’s no reason to keep him here.

He has nothing to contribute to the unit.

His presence gives the department controversy, atop the heroic standing developed in the fallout of Foresight’s arrest.

He nearly killed them all in what can only be rationalized as a temper tantrum.

How they can stand to be near him is beyond Lio’s comprehension.

It’s not only the Burnish that he’s failing.  
………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Walking into the apartment, Galo quickly flops onto the couch, moaning.

“UUUUGGGGGGGHHHHH, I miss work…”

“You’ve been gone for thirty minutes.” Lio dismisses as he grabs his laptop and settles on top of Galo’s back.

“But I’m boooooooooooored…” The other man wines into a pillow.

“Well perhaps this will be a lesson in impulse control for you.”

Turning his head to pout, Galo’s face crumbles into a tear-welling mess before pressing back into the pillow and bemoaning, _“I wanna be a super cool firefighter! I can’t do that if I’m at home!”_

“I know,” Lio comforts as he starts typing, rubbing circles in Galo’s back in sympathy as the other man sobs.

“But I can’t let this slow me down!” Galo suddenly declares, lifting his face up and shooting to his feet, Lio still in a sitting position without a care as he’s bounced into the air by the sudden movement before landing back on the couch, typing the entire time. “I’m gonna keep goin’! It’s my job to help the city! Even if I can’t be a firefighter right now, I can still do that!” Balling his fist, he pumps into the air, observing the ceiling with a triumphant smirk.

“Good boy,” Lio praises without looking up from his work.

“And you’re coming with me!” Galo declares, not even looking as he points at Lio.

After blinking in shock, Lio dismisses Galo with a, “No.” And returns his attention to his work immediately.

“Whaaaa?!” Galo grunts as he turns his head to look at Lio, “Why not?!”

“I’m already working on something,” Lio waves off, “I’m sure you can help people without me.”

“C’mon! We can go to the soup kitchen, pick up trash, wash puppies…”

“Yes, _you_ can do that,” Lio sharply points out, “But in case you’ve forgotten, I’m an inferno terrorist and as such a very vocal majority would rather see me in chains than planting trees.”

“That’s just because they don’t know you!” Galo tries to reason, face so close to the computer his nose is touching it, “The feisty, stubborn, determined, grumpy, loving you with a burning soul that I know! And I keep telling you that if anyone tries to give you shit, I’ll take care of ‘em!”

“If you punch someone again,” Lio explains with a raised eyebrow, “You’re going to get arrested.”

“Then my burning soul will keep me warm in the cold confines of prison!” Galo challenges, a determined look on his face.

“I hope it will, because I will not pay to have you released.”

“What?!”

“I don’t have any money.”

“I keep a hundred bucks under the-”

“That is _your_ money,” Lio corrects with a hint of warning in his voice, “I have no right to take it.”

“Not even to bail me out?!” Galo complains.

“Yes.”

“Uggh, Lio,” Galo starts seriously, “I’m sharing my life with you, so that means I’ll help you in whatever way you need, which includes money.” Gaze softening, he adds, “You don’t have to worry about paying me back, because I know that’s the real problem, I just want you to have every chance you can get at being happy. With me.” He says with a smile.

“…That’s ridiculous,” Lio says after a pause, not even looking at Galo, still typing.

Galo needs to quit convincing himself that Lio deserves all that Galo gives him.

It’s getting ridiculous.

Smile falling, Galo turns on his heel and limps to his room, shutting the door.

And now Lio has ruined Galo’s day yet again.

It’s nothing new, Lio is always just trying to cover up Galo’s sunshine, making him feel bad because Lio hasn’t quit being the worthless thing that he is yet, and every time he tries, he makes it worse.

Just like everything else in his life.

“I JUST HAD AN IDEA!” Galo yells as he slams the door open and runs back to the living room. “AND IT’S THE BEST IDEA EVER!”

“I doubt that,” Lio retorts, making Galo drop to the floor, “But go ahead.”

Springing back to his feet, smile and eyes wide with anticipation, Galo blurts out, “What if we went to a Burnish charity?! Oooh! We’ll go to the orphanage, the kids love you because you’re a pushover!”

“That…” Lio blinks in surprise, “Might actually work.”

“Oh yeah!” Galo calls out, hopping as he holds one leg and makes his free arm into a wing, “Even when he’s off, Galo Thymos is ON!”

“I’ll call them,” Lio says as Galo trips and falls, half his body falling onto the couch.

And just like that, Galo fixes everything after Lio ruined it.

It’s fortunate that they met, now there’s someone who can fix all of the messes Lio causes.

And since Galo fixes them, Lio can keep ruining things like the failure he is and not deal with the consequences.

How Galo can justify keeping him here when all Lio does is use him is beyond Lio’s comprehension.

How Galo’s still alive after spending so long with him also confuses him.

The others didn’t.

All those people…

_“Lio, why?!”_

I’m sorry!

_“You said you’d save us…”_

I didn’t know this would happen!

_“They followed us through…your heat signature…”_

…It’s my fault?

_“Sweet child, you must walk ahead, not on the side of your people.”_

No! I hate it up there, it’s so…Oh. Okay.

_“We know you’ll take us to safety.”_

(I don’t know!) I-I’ll try.

_“We all look to you.”_

I see. (Why?! You’re older than me!)

_“You know the way, we know you do.”_

But I don’t…

_“Shhhh. We will go wherever you lead, our lives are in your hands.”_

…Yes, I understand.

And then Mad Burnish…

_“You really showed us the light.”_

You are good people, you just needed time to think.

_“You always know where to go, don’t you?”_

…Yes.

_“We lost another five today.”_

It’s my fault, I should have planned that escape route better.

_“She…she was so hungry…”_

Here take this, I have already eaten. ( _Growl_.)

_“Five-year olds weren’t meant to be out here.”_

Find peace in the ashes child. (…Why doesn’t it hurt as much anymore?)

_Boss, are you okay? We lost a lot of people._

This fate is inevitable. (Is that why I greet the ashes like an old friend, why my heart no longer drops in their presence?)

(Is that why the only thing I can feel is the weight of my own failures?)

(What a selfish person I turned out to be.)

How Galo can delude himself into loving Lio is impossible to rationalize.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He's given everything so that his people may prosper.  
> Why is he being resentful of that now?

_The house is burning, but he can’t feel it._

_He can’t move._

_Something cold grew around him, he can’t move!_

_Why did these people come here?_

_Mother…Father…_

_Did he…Did he…_

_But, he didn’t mean to…_

_…Is this why they don’t like him anymore?_

_What…What’s going on?_

_…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………._

_What are these white walls?_

_It’s so cold._

_He wants to go home…_

_…Is home still there?_

_Who are all these people- Why are they so hurt?_

_What do they mean he’s never leaving?_

_Wait…Where are you taking me?!_

_No! Let me down!_

_NO! PLEASE DON’T SHOOT ME A-_

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

_It hurts._

_The scalpel hurts._

_The knives hurt._

_Where is the blood going?_

_Where did the cuts go? They just disappeared!_

_Why do you keep it so cold in here?_

_The voices are getting louder…_

_…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………_

_His arms grew back again._

_It’s scary._

_…Maybe if he got to burn, it wouldn’t be?_

_…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………._

_All the ice they put him in keeps burning._

_The others can’t do that._

_Some of them are impressed._

_The others keep telling him to knock it off, but he can’t. He keeps telling them that, but they don’t believe him._

_It’s like he tried to tell mother and father, it just happens._

_If he cries, things burn._

_If he laughs, things burn._

_If he gets angry, things burn._

_He doesn’t mean to._

_Do the others have that problem?_

_…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………._

_The others say they don’t._

_They say he’s stronger._

_…Why is he always so different?_

_…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………._

_They’re taking him somewhere._

_The others…No! They need him!_

_They’ll do things to them if he’s not there!_

_Cold…_

_No._

_Cold._

_No!_

_IT’S TOO COLD!_

_NO!_

_NO NO NO NO NO!_

_He’s burning, it’s everywhereThey’re still shooting himColdNOMORECOLD!_

“LIO! LIO WAKE UP!”

Opening his eyes, the ice it’s everywhere-

“No, it’s not, there’s no ice, you’re not burning!”

The ice is gone.

Galo’s there.

He looks worried.

Catching his breath and looking around, he sees files, on the floor and couch, folders and papers a mess.

He fell asleep.

He was working, and he fell asleep.

Great. He’s even more pathetic than he thought.

“You okay?” Galo asks, hand going towards Lio before the smaller flinches, making Galo retract his arm instantly.

“I…I…” He tries to say, “I’m fine.”

“Lio…”

“Don’t. Don’t look at me like that.” Lio orders, raising his head in a glare. “I am fine, there is no need to be concerned.”

“…Bad dream?” Galo asks with eyes full of sympathy without an ounce of pity.

Eyes that Lio will never lie to.

“…Yes.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No,” Lio quickly refuses. “I don’t.”

“Lio…”

“It’s fine.”

“…Are you cold?”

“Huh?!” Lio gasps, Galo’s sharp mind catching him off guard again.

“You fell asleep and you weren’t using any blankets, so you’re probably really cold.” Galo explains.

“I’m…I will be fine.”

“Aaaaaaand, that’s Lio for, ‘Yeah, I am but I don’t wanna say anything,’” Galo says in exasperation before hopping off of the couch and grabbing the blankets he leaves there for Lio, “Give me a minute, and I’ll fix everything!” And he takes off before Lio can say anything.

“…”

Galo Thymos truly astounds him.

Why does he waste his time with Lio?

There are so many more, wonderful people he could spend his days with.

Ones that actually accomplish things.

Ones that weren’t dangerous criminals with flames that hurt so many.

Ones that…

…

“And comin’ through!” Galo warns as he bursts back through the front door, blankets in hands. Heading over to Lio, he crouches in front of him, “Don’t worry, I got just the thing to help you sleep snug as a bug in a rug, my little Firebug!”

“Galo,” Lio starts, “That is unnecessary, I need to get back to work.”

“Lio, it’s 4:00 a.m. and we’re going to the orphanage at 8:00, you need sleep!”

“I will be fine.”

“Well you should at least try to stay warm!”

Regarding Galo’s pouting face and thoroughly exhausted from memories, Lio sighs and surrenders with a, “If it will keep your mouth shut.”

“It won’t!” Galo denies cheerfully, lifting a blanket up. “Okay, get ready for impact!”

“I can pull a blanket over myself.” Lio protests.

“I know,” Galo acknowledges, “But I want to!” And with that, a blanket is thrown over and settled onto Lio’s shoulders.

Wait…it feels…

“Threw these in the dryer for a few minutes,” Galo explains, again figuring out exactly what Lio’s curious about, “Mama used to do this for me when I was a kid and had bad dreams.” He shares as he tucks a second blanket around Lio’s front.

“It’s…warm.”

Not blisteringly hot like he was used to.

Soft, simple warmth.

Not burning.

“Feels good?” Galo asks expectantly. “All warm and toasty?”

…It should.

“It’s nice,” he admits.

And it is, it feels wonderful, the cold air around him evaporates from the heat of the blankets as Galo wraps a third around Lio.

He likes it.

It’s just not enough.

“Great!” Galo says as he settles onto the couch.

“What are you doing?” Lio inquires, “Go back to bed.”

“Nope!” Galo denies with closed eyes and a smirk. “If you’re gonna be stubborn and stay up, so am I!”

“So I should take you back to bed in about ten minutes after you fall asleep?”

“No! If anything, I’m gonna have to lay you down when _you_ pass out! The warmth makes your eyelids grow heavier with each passing second, Lio Fotia! Don’t even try to fight it!”

“I see, is that why you blocked in my arms?” Lio questions. “Was this all part of your plan?”

A devious look on his face, Galo cheekily says, “Maybe.”

“Well I’m afraid you will not succeed, I’ve kept myself awake through more pressing circumstances before.”

“You don’t have to anymore,” Galo tries to empathize, “You can sleep, and if you have bad dreams, I’ll help.”

“You do enough for me,” Lio argues, “And you have your own nightmares to deal with.”

“You help me with those.”

“I always will.”

“So why can’t I help you?”

“…It’s not important.”

“…You’re not gonna sleep, are you?”

“No.”

“Well, then I guess it’s on!” Galo suddenly declares.

“Hm?” Lio hums.

“I’m gonna prove to you I can be just as much of a night owl as you, Fotia!” He smirks, getting up and pointing a finger at Lio, “That’s right! You, me, endurance contest! Whoever stays up longer wins!”

“How childish,” Lio scoffs with a shake of his head.

“So you’re not in?!”

“No, I am, it’s just childish.”

“Awww, yeah!” Galo fist pumps as he sits back down.

Galo’s own heat far eclipses the blankets.

It’s warmth as strong as the fire he had, but not as striking.

Lio loves it.

It’s not enough.

The cold air is nothing compared to the cold that’s filled Lio’s body.

The Promare took all of it’s warmth with it.

They left Lio a husk that’s useless on it’s own.

He needs the fire.

He needs what left him persecuted and ostracized from his fellow man.

He needs to be himself again.

Someone who at least had the power to try to defend those who he cares for.

At least he’s still the criminal he built his life around.

He’s still the monster that endangers lives.

And he’ll always be a failure.

The one Galo would do much better without.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

“‘What do you think you’re doing?’”

“Huh?!” Galo says as he snaps back to being awake, the children laughing at him as he looks around in confusion.

“Settle down,” Lio urges before he continues, “‘We’re your friends and we wanna help!’ Said the tin boy, with a yelp. Otabin smiled, and paced the floor. ‘I’ve never had real friends before.’

“‘Then we’ll be your first!’ The chicken witch clucked. Otabin couldn’t believe his luck!

“So bookmaker Otabin, surrounded by friends, bound a book of friendship. And that’s the end.” He finishes, closing the book with a small smile, the children on the floor applauding.

“Yay!”

“Now children,” the supervisor cuts in gently, “What do we tell Mr. Boss for coming out here?”

Standing up, the children say in unison, “Thank you, Mr. Boss!”

Warmth.

It feels warm inside of him.

“It was no trouble,” Lio deflects, placing a hand on a child’s head, heart fluttering at the pleased giggle he receives, “My duty is to ensure the health and happiness of all the Burnish.”

“All right children,” the matron calls, clapping her hands, “Now that story time is over, let’s head outside!”

“Oh, Mr. Boss!” One girl pipes up, grabbing Lio’s hand, “Come play with me!”

“Nooo!” A boy whines, pulling on Lio’s free arm, “Hang out with me!”

“No! Mr. Boss is gonna play with me!” Another child squeals from behind Lio’s legs.

“In your dreams, Mr. Boss wants to help us build a fort!” A girl claims from atop Lio’s head.

“No, Mr. Boss is gonna play light up the can with us!”

“I’m playing with Mr. Boss!”

“No, me!”

“Let go!”

As the squabble devolves into the children all but brawling on top of him, pulling Lio in all directions, the matron finally steps in.

“Children!” She scolds, “There is no need to carry on like this!” Deciding to end the fight here and now, she declares, “If you don’t stop, Mr. Boss won’t want to play with any of you.”

A gasp spreads across the children (and Galo) and Lio quickly appeases bending down, “Burnish should not fight amongst ourselves. I would gladly play with all of you, but we should not settle this with conflict, but with listening and understanding, yes?”

Seeing the children look to the floor in shame, muttering, “Yes, Mr. Boss,” in shame, Lio quickly adds, “I’m not mad, I just want everyone to keep helping each other, like we always do. Okay? Do you all promise me?”

“Yeah!” The children call out in joy, delighted to have a way to impress their Boss.

“Good.” Lio praises, “Now go out and play, I will join you shortly.”

Following the matron outside excitedly, Lio’s inside is filled with warmth as he puts up the book and cleans up the children’s messes.

_Sniffffff._

And turns his head to a teary-eyed Galo.

“Are you alright?” Lio asks.

Sniffling, Galo whispers, _“You’re an angel.”_

“That is incorrect on so many accounts.”

“You’re, you’re just so, ugggh,” Galo blubbers, “I love you so much.”

“Oh really?”

“You’re just so lovable-I CAN’T HANDLE IT!”

“I’m afraid I disagree with you,” Lio retorts as he collects empty juice pouches, “I find myself having many detestable qualities, Galo Thymos.”

“Ugghhh!” Galo grunts in annoyance, his mood of adoration evaporating into frustration, “Lio, everyone here loves you because you’re amazing! Why can’t you get that already?!” Turning his head and crossing his arms, the taller continues, “You better get it figured out by the time our kids come along!”

“‘Our’ kids?” Lio blinks in confusion.

“Yeah, all the kids we’re gonna adopt once the government gets off your back and lifts your probation!” Galo explains simply, “And we’ll get you a motorcycle, and we can get rid of your ankle monitor, and we’ll go on vacation all over the world…”

“You sound quite…” Lio tries to find the right response, “Certain that we will still be together once that happens.”

“Well duh, we’re gonna be together forever!” Galo answers immediately. Pausing with widening eyes, he asks, “You’re not…leaving, are you?”

Insecurity.

It even exists within Galo.

He’s more fragile than anyone else realizes.

Someone who’s been used and tossed aside, abandoned.

Perhaps this is why he understands the Burnish so well.

“No.” Lio tells him, even though he should.

Even though Galo deserves better.

A partner who can hold him and be held by him.

One who can open their heart and not fear irrational betrayal.

One who Lio will envy for all eternity when Galo finally meets them.

“Do you wanna talk?” Galo asks. “About your nightmare, whatever’s going on with Gueira and Meis, what happened with that fire, anything?”

“…No.”

It’s not his problem.

It’s Lio’s. He should deal with it himself.

The others have, he should not be the exception.

“…You’re gonna have to, one day.” Galo warns, before turning and heading out the door to the playground. _“Hey kids! Who wants to play with the Great Galo Thymos?!”_

_“Ewww, no!”_

_“GAAAGGGGHH! The disapproval…it weakens me so…”_

If the others could fix their problems, Lio should be able to fix his own.

He is their leader, he needs to be stable for them.

If he is the only one that is still weakened, then he has wasted their time.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

“Mr. Boss! I got a 100 on my quiz yesterday!”

“That’s wonderful,” Lio praises, patting Cherche on the head, “I’m very proud of you.”

“I have good news too!” Ruskin pipes up, “I’ve been practicing really hard and the coach said that I could join the team next season!”

“Really?” Lio says in surprise. “I’m glad that all of your hard work has paid off, this is very exciting.”

“What did you like to do as a kid, Mr. Boss?” Precious Miela asks innocently.

“Oh,” Lio begins, “I’m afraid that when I was around your age I had already awakened, so I had to live on the run and help others. And I was very busy, so I didn’t have much time to develop any hobbies.”

“Oh,” the little darling says with her head going down, “I’m sorry,” she whimpers.

“Shhh,” Lio gently advises, lifting the girl into his lap and pulling her into his arms, “If I hadn’t done that, then I wouldn’t have been able to give you all the opportunities you have now, and that’s far more important to me.”

“But…it’s not fair,” the girl protests, “You should get to have fun too.”

Sighing fondly, the man tells her, “I am blessed enough to see all of you running around with smiling faces,” he tells her with a gentle look, “Now why don’t all of you go play with Mr. Thymos? He looks like he’s having fun.” He suggests, pointing to the man running around making airplane noises while wearing fairy wings and letting the children on his back steer him with his hair.

“Okay!” They agree, running off to grab onto Galo’s legs.

Watching them enjoy themselves should be enough to make him happy.

It should.

There is no point in wondering what his life would have been like if he had the same opportunities as them.

He did what he did to give his people a better life, whether or not he lived to be a part of it was irrelevant.

He honestly believed that he would not survive to see the day his people were free, he accepted his destiny as a martyr.

As things are now, he can’t help but wonder if his life would be as enriched as theirs if he were not himself.

He should be honored that his sacrifices made this possible.

This resentment that has begun to fester should not exist.

The purpose of his life was to secure hope for the future of the Burnish, his own was a token sacrifice.

Yet he lives.

And envies the children who live the life he dreamed of, carefree, not having to guide those who need them or keep their feelings hidden to prevent burning cities to the ground.

One who envies children that have suffered because he did not do more for them.

He is a pathetic excuse of a man.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

At the support group meeting, Lio is floored by just how much his people have recovered in such a short amount of time.

“I have a job interview,” Matilda tells him, “My husband’s thrilled, I…it’s stupid, but I never thought I’d see an office again.”

“That’s wonderful to hear,” Lio tells her, “I’m sure you’ll do fine.”

_I’m a criminal, so I can’t apply for a job._

What?

“My boyfriend waited for me,” Fritz says sheepishly, “We’re getting married.”

“Congratulations” is echoed throughout the room.

_My boyfriend can’t kiss me without me going into hysterics, so marriage is out of the question._

What is this?

“I saved up enough money to take my family to the beach!” Petra boasts, “I’m goin’ for it!”

“YEEEAAAAAHHHHHH!” Is screamed across the room, not one of the legendarily belligerent voices of Mad Burnish coming close to matching Galo’s.

_I’m not allowed to leave the city._

What is going on?!

“I’m finally starting to see some progress,” Blitz says in relief, “I’m really getting my head together.”

Lio gives him a faint smile and briefly rests a hand on his shoulder.

_How come I can’t **my** head together, huh?! Why don’t **I** get to?!_

SHUT UP!

“Is it weird,” Celena pipes up, “That sometimes…I forget what the flames felt like?”

Variations of “No” circle throughout the room.

_YES! YES IT IS! I’LL NEVER FORGET! EVERYTHING’S TOO COLD NOW! I WANT TO BURN!_

STOP IT!

His people have suffered, they deserve this happiness.

His purpose was to bring it to them, he was not meant to have it for himself.

He does not have the right to complain, he was the only one strong enough to guide them.

He failed them, so it also counts as his punishment.

What he wants is irrelevant.

His envy is meaningless.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

“You were kinda quiet at that thing,” Galo starts as they walk home, “Are you okay?”

“It’s not important.” Lio dismisses, not even turning to look at Galo.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

He’s alone.

Galo went out to pick something up and insisted Lio stay home, citing, “Dude, you look Mr. Sandman hasn’t visited you in thirty years, and you’re probably not thirty! Stay home and relax!”

When that argument failed, he turned to his puppy dog eyes.

Damn him.

Well, he might as well use this time to refocus his mind.

Breathing in deeply then out, he tries to ground himself.

Your life, is for the Burnish.

_One…two…_

You were stronger than them, so it was your responsibility to guide and protect them.

_Inhale…exhale…_

You failed.

_Inhale…_

So many died because you were a fool.

_Exhale…_

But there are still those who survived and have begun to thrive in this new world.

_And that is what I have dreamed of._

Such envy over this is uncalled for.

_I have no right to be so selfish._

He has, and will always belong to the Burnish.

_As it should be._

His mind.

_“How do you make these plans?”_

Every thought of mine is devoted to your safety.

_“You always think ahead.”_

I will lead us to the future I dream of.

His body.

_“Lio…No…we can’t do this…I…you’re only fourteen!”_

You fear intimacy with others because of your flames, but I am strong enough to withstand them.

_“You’re just a kid!”_

Do not see me as a child, see me as your leader, who wishes to give you reassurance.

_“…”_

His heart.

_“Boss…you’ll never fall in love if you don’t take some time for yourself.”_

Romance is unnecessary, I have devoted my life to our survival.

_“…Love isn’t a distraction.”_

I know. All the love I have is for our people, Meis.

“ _You know that’s not what I’m talkin’ about.”_

It’s what you will receive.

His soul.

These flames light him in his mission.

They will burn a path that will save his people.

He will not let himself feel envy of them.

If he is suffering, it is his own fault for not finding a solution.

He cannot allow himself to falter, his people still need him.

Do they?

They’re doing fine without him.

Yes, but-

They’re moving on, they don’t need him.

My life-

You’re not.

I-

“I’m home!” Galo greets, “And I got a great deal on prosciutto! We’re eatin’ like kings tonight, Lio!”

“That’s nice,” Lio answers, vaguely understanding.

“Yup! But you know,” Galo says as he puts the meat up and moves onto the couch, “Today was great, but my burning soul needs a little _action_ to help keep it as bright as it is.”

Galo wants sex.

“Oh?” Lio says, “And you need my assistance?”

Lio will give it.

“Yeah,” Galo confirms with a smirk, moving his head closer, “Up to it?”

He doesn’t have to ask.

“You know the answer to that,” Lio purrs, meeting Galo’s lips with his own.

Lio will never deny his beloved what he desires.

Fingers grazing, Lio slips his legs around Galo’s waist.

“Mmmm…”

_Taking in pleasure after wishing misfortune on your people? You are a disgrace._

“Unnghhh…”

“Lio?” Galo questions, breaking at Lio’s moan of discomfort. “You okay?”

Huffing, Lio tells him, “Focus,” and launches himself back onto Galo.

“Mmph! Mmmm…”

_You envy the children for something you knew you were never meant to have._

His hand trembles.

“Lio.” Galo stops again, firmer this time, “What’s wrong?”

“Just…keep going…”

“…Okay.”

_You have no right to complain._

His whole body flinches.

“Okay, stop.” Galo says, pulling them apart. “Are you even in the mood?”

“It’s fine,” Lio argues, because Galo shouldn’t have to sacrifice his happiness because Lio’s distracted, “I can still perform-”

“Are you in the mood?” Galo repeats firmly.

“…No.”

Head turned downward, it’s childish but Lio’s not focused enough to care.

“Okay,” Galo states as he gets up, “Then we’re stopping. I’ll go start dinner.”

Head snapping back up, Lio protests, “But you wanted to-!”

“But you didn’t,” Galo shoots back, “And we’re not doing it if you don’t. I don’t work like that.”

“I…”

“You being comfy means way more to me than gettin’ lucky, okay?”

“…”

“Okay?” Galo tries again, leaning his head closer.

“…I’m sorry.”

“Dude, it’s fine!” Galo reassures with a smile, “It only feels good when we _both_ want it, okay?” Turning around, he marches back to the kitchen. “Now I’m gonna make you something awesome for dinner, so get ready, bro!”

…

How did he get so selfish?

Shooting up off the couch, he powerwalks to the balcony, dismissing Galo’s concerns with a, “I want to be alone.”

_Fwssh!_

Closing the door behind him, he sinks to his knees and clutches at the sides of his head.

He’s envying the others for things he doesn’t deserve.

His people are recovering while he’s stuck in the void the Promare left.

He’s only thinking about himself.

And now he’s depriving Galo.

Selfish…

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

“Sorry we’re late!” The loud man apologizes while his partner organizes the table, “Someone decided to get horny and get us late for our shift!”

“Yeah,” the man with one half of his face visible says without looking up, “You.”

“Why you-!”

“Gueira, Meis, it’s fine,” the matron dismisses, “Though the children are eager to see you two.”

“Yeah!” Gueira agrees, “Told ‘em I’d teach ‘em how to hotwire today!”

“Dude.” Meis scolds, “Not in front of the boss lady.”

“That reminds me,” the woman interrupts, “You’ll never believe who came over to visit!”

Confused, the two share a look before turning back to her.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The final flare gives way to an explosion.

“Lio.”

_Click, click, click._

“Lio.”

_Click, click, click._

_Fwup!_

“Lio.” Galo repeats, hand slammed onto the shut laptop.

“Yes?” Lio all but hisses, a dirty look on his face.

“You’ve been working nonstop since I got home yesterday,” the man accuses, a glare on his own face, “You didn’t even look at your dinner, I know that because it was still sitting at the table when I woke up, and I know you didn’t eat anything else yesterday and you probably didn’t the day before! And I can probably count how many nights you’ve been staying up from how many bags are under your eyes!” Pointing a finger at said organs, Galo seems furious.

“And the point you wished to make is?” Lio asks in annoyance, his attempt to steal back the computer thwarted by Galo’s longer reach.

“The point is, it stops now!” Galo declares. “I’m not just gonna stand here and let you work yourself to death! You’re taking a break, right now!”

“I can’t afford to take a break,” Lio shoots back, “I have to finish the proposal-”

“You said you finished before we left yesterday!”

“I’ve accepted to work on another.”

“Why?!”

“Because my people need me to!”

“Because you’re not letting them do it without you!”

“I beg your pardon?” Lio growls.

“Every little thing that comes up with the Burnish, you shove yourself right onto it and take just about every part of it for yourself! Even if you don’t know what it is! Then you work your ass off trying to get it done without letting anyone help you! That’s not being a leader, that’s you trying to prove your life still matters by killing yourself, don’t give me that look, you know you are!”

Glaring, Lio tries to argue, “So you would rather that I leave my people in their time of need so that I can sit around and accomplish nothing?”

“No, I want you to let your people help you so you don’t work yourself into a breakdown!”

“I will be fine-”

“No you won’t!”

Growling, Lio shoots into a standing position and attempts to swipe the computer back. “Give me back my work, Galo!” But he can barely focus his vision, and movements are embarrassingly slow and uncoordinated compared to his usual ability, pausing to catch his breath repeatedly.

“See?!” Galo stresses, “You can barely keep up, you’re destroying your body! You need to stop right now or you’re gonna start shutting down!” Worry seeping onto his face, Galo concludes, “You can’t help anyone if you put yourself in the hospital!”

Stopping, Lio catches his breath before getting out, “So what would you suggest, Galo Thymos?”

“You’re not getting your laptop back,” Galo declares, worried face shifting into a determined one. “You’re taking a break, I’m tiring you out: we’re going out to lunch, taking a walk around town, buying you whatever the heck you want and then coming home and putting you in bed before you have a heart attack, okay?”

“Absolutely not,” Lio responds without hesitation, “I am not going to indulge in such ridiculously hedonistic behavior while there are so many that still suffer.”

“You’re not-Ugghh!” Galo groans in frustration. “Why can’t you just take five seconds to relax so you don’t kill yourself?!”

“I will not stop, Galo Thymos.” Lio grits out.

“Then you lose.”

“…” Blinking in surprise, Lio manages to get out, “Excuse me?”

“We’re makin’ this a contest,” Galo clarifies. “If you can go the whole day without passing out, you get your work back. If you don’t, you’re gonna spend the rest of our suspension relaxing!”

“Are you serious?” Lio asks condescendingly, “Why would I ever agree to such a ridiculous wager?”

“So you can’t do it?” Galo says in a tone that is slightly…mocking?

“No, I am not saying that, but that idea is ridiculous, so I do not agree.”

“Because you can’t.”

“No, I can, but I won’t.”

“You can’t win Lio!” Galo dismisses.

“Yes I can!” Lio screams pushing his head forward.

“Then prove it!” Galo challenges, meeting Lio’s forehead with his own.

“Fine!” Lio declares, turning to collect his shoes.

“Take a shower first!” Galo scolds, “You reek!”

Grunting, Lio knows he shouldn’t have given in.

He should have taken his work back by force.

But Galo always disarms him.

He knows his weaknesses.

He knows his insecurities.

He knows Lio hates to lose.

And Lio would never attack him if he had something Lio wanted.

He couldn’t live with himself if he hurt one more person he loved.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

“Eat up Lio,” Galo chides gently, snapping Lio back to full consciousness.

Startled, he whips his head around until he registers his surroundings, recognizing the restaurant Galo took him to, said man pausing mid-bite at Lio’s outburst.

“I…” Lio says, eyes wide as his heart slows down, “I apologize.”

“Tired?” Galo says, gently _( ~~infuriatingly~~ ), _“You wanna go home?”

Looking down at his plate and glaring, Lio stabs his fork in and says, “I do not concede so easily.” Biting down on his food, it goes down in way similar to cement being poured into a hole.

 _Keep going,_ he thinks to himself, _Don’t you dare fall asleep, you have too many relying on you to provide for them, there is no time for you to waste._

“I’m not-Whatever, okay.” Galo agrees, continuing to eat. “You know, if your tummy was all fixed up, I would’ve just stuffed ya silly and let you slip into a food coma.”

“That is ridiculous,” Lio dismisses in a huff, “Overeating accomplishes nothing and only provides discomfort, so I would not allow myself to do so.”

“Not like you could,” Galo notes, “Not when you keep dividing your food up for other people that aren’t here.”

“What are you- Oh.” He says in surprise as he looks at the plate he’d been dividing as Galo said. “I…”

“It’s okay,” Galo tries to reassure, “You spent a long time looking after people, so it’s probably an unconscious thing, don’t-”

“I do not need your patronization,” Lio hisses, “I have had an adequate amount of time to fix the problem, and I have failed to do so. That is all.”

He always fails, and now Galo’s making him waste time.

No, it’s his own fault, he shouldn’t have given in to Galo’s antics.

“I don’t pity you,” Galo says, calmly. “‘Old habits die hard,’ y’know? I leave the door open when I use the toilet, you try to save your food for people that live somewhere else, it just happens! Now finish eating, we gotta fix your cheeks!”

Stopping the bite he was about to take, Lio gives Galo a suspicious glance and asks, “Is there a problem with them?”

“Uh, yeah!” Galo says, as if it were obvious, “They sank like one of Varys’ chocolate chippies in milk! See?!” He stresses, shoving a spoon in front of Lio’s face to see that yes, his cheeks are visibly sunken, perfectly complimenting his strained eyes and washed out skin. “So start shovelin’ that stuff in and get those sweet chubby face pillows pudged back up!”

Now his worthlessness is visible, how lovely.

“If you are so dissatisfied with my appearance,” Lio grits out, “Then you don’t have to take me out with you where everyone can see us, Galo Thymos.”

“Ugh, Lio,” Galo grunts, “Quit trying to make everything into a fight, I’m just trying to help!”

And he’s taking his frustrations out on Galo. Again.

He’s despicable.

“…I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine, just eat, okay?” Galo pleads, puppy dog eyes at the ready.

And Galo forgives him.

Why?

Picking his fork back up Lio tries to quiet his mind while Galo chatters on, gesturing animatedly to resemble a bird he saw.

“So,” Lio cuts in, as an attempt to return to their previous amicability, “Your preferred plan would be to overfeed me?” He teases lightly, lifting a bite into his mouth and forcing it down.

“Yeah!” Galo brightens up, “I’d make you all the tasty food you never got to have and pile the table so high it reaches the ceiling!”

“Wouldn’t that be a fire hazard?” Lio jests, fake concern etched onto his face.

“If there were a fire, I’d put it out immediately!” Galo declares, hands on his hips, chest puffed out with pride, “And then I’d plop you in my lap and keep feedin’ you until you’re nice and full of good food.”

“With your hands?”

“Yup!”

“And I suppose you’d rub my stomach to help me avoid indigestion afterwards?”

“You know it!”

“Galo Thymos,” Lio teases with a smirk, “Are you sure your intentions are innocent? It sounds like you intend to fatten me up and eat me. Though, I’m not sure _how_ you intend to eat me. Would it be up or out?”

“Huh?!” Galo squeals, flustered. “Damn it Lio!” He complains with a red face he tries to hide behind his hands, squirming and twisting. “Why do you have to make everything gross?!”

“Well, with the way you phrase things-”

“I just want to make sure you eat!” Galo bemoans. “I want you to eat good food and get healthier, and you won’t do it unless I watch you!”

“I do not require your coddling.” Lio argues, stuffing another bite into his mouth.

It makes him feel sick.

“Then feed yourself.” Galo urges, “You deserve it.”

He really doesn’t.

So many others are starving because he’s not getting anything done.

He’s stopping for lunch while many of his people don’t have one.

Cruel.

“I…”

“Full?”

“…I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine,” Galo reassures, “Don’t push yourself, we’ll get you eatin’ normally in no time!”

“…”

It’s a waste of time.

He can’t eat if the Burnish aren’t, he never could.

It’s not fair.

“I’m gonna head to the boys’ room,” Galo says as he gets up, Lio paying half attention, “If the waitress comes back, tell her you want a to go box, ‘kay?”

“Of course.” Lio manages to get out, eyes trained on the table.

 _“Mommy?”_ He hears a child call out, _“Why are we leaving?”_

 _“Shhh,”_ The supposed mother scolds, _“Keep your voice down or it’ll see us.”_

_“You mean the green person?”_

_“Honey, don’t! That’s not a person, that’s a monster.”_

…Huh, he was just thinking the same thing.

It’s funny.

Enough to get a little chuckle out of him.

It makes sense, only a monster would stop and go out to eat while it’s people are starving.

He can see it, the neon flames surrounding him, the city burning from his flames, his body cloaked in ash, armored by a dragon that breathes his misplaced rage at the innocent.

It’s what he really is.

That was his real face, this one’s the fake.

It’s funny.

He can tell people are staring at him, the terrorist who almost killed them all giggling to himself quietly alone at a table, but he just doesn’t care.

He was going to scare them anyway.

He knows he’s scaring Galo, teal eyes wide with concern as he keeps giggling.

And it’s not of Lio, it’s for Lio.

Funny.

He shouldn’t waste his time.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

“You sure you’re okay?” Galo asks again and frankly, it’s starting to annoy Lio.

“If I was not,” Lio bites back, “Would I not have told you within the first sixty times you asked?”

“No,” Galo responds quickly, “You wouldn’t.”

“…I will be fine.” Lio says after a pause.

“You sure you don’t want to just go home?” Galo insists.

“Contrary to your expectations, I am not some weakling that constantly requires you to coddle them.”

“I didn’t say you _were_ , but I do know you’ve had a lot going on lately and it’s probably wearing you out.”

“I will be fine.”

“Are you fine right now?”

“…”

“Lio.”

“Can we just continue your little tour?” Lio says, not looking Galo in the face.

“…Sure.” Galo says, looking down.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

“BEHOLD!” Galo cries out as he stops in front of a building, instantly turning on his heel to face Lio while making hand gestures that would not look out of place on the hands of a magician. “The Promepolis Museum of Natural History! A peek into the wonders of a world far before mankind’s touch reached it, where there was no certainty and the animals survived solely on their base instincts! This astounding replication of the past-”

“Is closed.” Lio interrupts.

“HUHHHH?!!!” Galo screams in shock, turning his head to see the closed sign hanging from the museum’s doorhandles. “NOOOOOOOOOO!” He cries, tears bursting out like his eyes are firehoses, “My special history day with Lio, NOOOOO!” Sobbing as he falls to his knees, Lio believes he can hear Galo whimper, _“We were gonna look at the mammoths…”_

This depression lasts for two more seconds before Galo hops to his feet and declares, “Well then we’ll just move on to the next part of _‘Galo Thymos’ Magnificently Outstanding Tour of His Favorite Spots in Promepolis!’_ Onward!” He commands, pointing northeast and marching, guided by his lifted finger, Lio following as fast as he can.

_“Huff…”_

Keep moving.

Don’t fall.

You do not have that luxury.

“And over here,” Galo begins, “Is the only convenience store where I can get cool snacks that originated from a far east island nation! Ready for your first pocky, Lio?!”

“No.” Lio answers immediately.

“Why not?!” Galo whines with a pout.

“Because the owner closed the store the second he saw me walk by.” Lio points out calmly.

“Huh?!” Galo grunts, “What’s the big idea?!” He demands, banging on the door-

Until he sees the anti-Burnish sticker, a small technicolor flame in a crossed out red circle on the door.

Well that’s predictable.

Even when faced with undeniable evidence that they were in the wrong, the common man will cling to his disproven ideas, a mix of pride and fear keeping them from changing.

And Lio’s letting his brethren mix with these people, all because he met one person who was willing to accept them.

His selfish desires have truly clouded his judgement.

“Asshole!” Galo declares as he turns back around to Lio.

“…So…”

“I’ll start buying them online.” Galo decides. “Because SOME SHOPS ARE RUN BY BIGOTED ASSHOLES!” He yells, drawing attention to them.

“Galo,” Lio tries to calm him, “It’s fine.”

“No, it’s not!” Galo argues back, “You don’t deserve to have people treat you like that!”

“Galo, I have suffered through far worse than not being allowed in a store, calm down.”

“That doesn’t it make it okay!” Galo roars, “You saved the world, you shouldn’t have to-”

_Splash!_

Cold.

It’s cold.

It’s seeping all throughout his clothes, into his skin.

 _“What the hell?!”_ He thinks he hears Galo yell. _“Get back here!”_

Cold, cold, cold.

_The ice surrounding him, his people captured, Freeze Force found them, he failed-_

_“Lio? Lio!”_ Galo’s saying but it’s like there’s a tunnel between them, Galo’s not right in front of him, he’s away-

_“Yes I am!”_

_Gueira and Meis are launching him away, no! He needs to protect them, no! No no no!_

“You’re not there!”

He can hear Galo, clear. Galo’s right in front of him, kneeled in front of him on the ground, why is he on the ground?

Wet.

He’s cold because he’s wet.

Oh.

Someone splashed him with water, there’s a bucket discarded on the ground.

…

He almost had a panic attack over a cruel prank.

If this is what his people have for a leader, then the Burnish are doomed.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

“Which one?” Galo asks, holding two shirts up, one with a Burnish flare on it and another with a hood in the shape of Galo’s mohawk. “Gotta say, I’ve always been curious what it’d look like if we did a hair swap.”

“It’s unnecessary,” Lio argues within the clothing store Galo dragged him to after stripping him of his borrowed sweatshirt and throwing his own t-shirt onto him, the fabric nearly giving Lio enough room to swim in.

“No it’s not!” Galo shoots back. “We needed to get you new clothes anyway! And this was way faster than getting you something else at home, so it works out! Now come on, you know you want the hawk!”

“If you wanted your sweatshirt back,” Lio grits out, “You only had to say so.”

“You know I don’t care about that Lio,” Galo says with a warning tone, “You’re just trying to start a fight so I can’t do something nice for you. Again.”

“I get it, I’m pathetic, thank you for the reminder Galo.” Lio hisses back.

“Hey! None of that, or I’m getting you the ‘Government Does Their Best’ shirt!”

“There’s no shirt like that.”

“You want to take that chance?”

“…”

“…”

“Fine.” Lio resigns with a sigh.

“S’what I thought.” Galo smirks triumphantly. “And don’t plan on doing anything soon, we’re gonna be here awhile, we need to fill up your side of the closet.”

“I only need one shirt, Galo.” Lio protests.

“No, you need more so you can have nice clean clothes everyday!”

“That’s not necessary.”

“Yes it is!”

“You are ridiculous!”

“Well you’re a gremlin!”

“Boss?”

Freezing, Lio stands still as he hears footprints approaching, accompanied by a cool voice softly asking, “Is that-?”

“Meis!” Another voice he’s been avoiding calls out. “I found the earring ya wanted for yer dick- Boss?”

“ _Lio_?” Galo whispers, voice concerned, “ _What’s wrong, why don’t you just talk to them_?”

“Boss?” He hears again, the normally rambunctious voice uncharacteristically tender, a hand on his shoulder he’s too tired to resist the pull of, turning him around to meet the gazes of the two people he didn’t want to see, their eyes going wide with worry as they take in his current state.

“What the hell?” Gueira says, shaken while Meis lightly bats Gueira’s hand away and grips Lio’s shoulders to look him over with growing concern. “Boss, you look like shit, what’s wrong?!”

“I…” Lio tries to say, but the words are caught in his mouth.

“Are you sick?” Meis asks in worry, quickly brushing Lio’s bangs up and placing a hand on his forehead. “You don’t have a temperature, are you eating enough? Any problems sleeping?”

Why are they…fussing over him?

They’re supposed to hate him, he destroyed everything they worked for.

“I…I’m fine.” Lio finally manages to get out.

“That’s bullshit!” Gueira cuts in, worried anger written across his face, “You don’t talk to us for months and the next time we see you, ya look like yer gonna drop dead! What’s goin’ on?!” Eyes widening before narrowing in anger, he asks, “Is someone messin’ with you?! You tell me right now, or I swear, I’ll-”

“Wait!” Galo cuts in, shock apparent, “You guys didn’t have a fight?!”

“The fuck ‘er you talkin’ about Thymos?!” Gueira says as he switches to Galo, “Where’d you get that idea from, idiot?!”

“Did we say somethin’?” Meis asks, eye still trained on Lio, “We say somethin’ that pissed you off?”

“No,” Lio begins, “No, I…”

All the fault is his and his alone.

“Then what’s wrong?!” Gueira demands, “You gotta tell us so we can help!” He practically begs.

“C’mon,” Meis pleads, stroking his cheek and brushing some hair behind his ear, the touch too good to resist leaning into, “You can tell us.”

“Guys,” Galo tries to interrupt, “Let’s not crowd him. Let’s let him go at his own pace and-”

“You stay outta this!” Gueira demands, pushing himself between Galo and Lio. “This doesn’t involve you, Hooters!”

“What?!” Galo cries in disbelief. “Why are you getting mad at me?! I’m trying to help!”

“Ain’t yer problem,” Meis dismisses as he pulls Lio closer to him, giving Galo a glare with the visible half of his face. Galo meets that with a glare of his own made from dismission and…envy?

“The hell it isn’t!” Galo challenges. “If something’s wrong with Lio-”

“We’ll handle it.” Meis shoots down.

No, that’s not your job.

“Like you obviously couldn’t.” Gueira growls.

It’s not his either.

“Are you blaming me?!”

No, no it’s not Galo’s fault.

“Well you clearly weren’t doin’ anything ta help!”

This is Lio’s fault.

“Why, you-!”

Lio’s supposed to find solutions, not create new problems.

Even if that’s what he ends up doing.

“Shut up!”

He shouldn’t make the others waste their time on his problems, he should be helping them deal with theirs.

He needs to fix this.

Now.

Pulling back from Meis, a soft, “Boss,” leaving the man’s mouth, attracting Gueira’s attention away from fighting with Galo, Lio straightens himself out and begins, “There is no need to fight amongst yourselves, the fault is my own, and I apologize.”

“What?” Gueira says in disbelief, “What’re you sorry fer?”

“I have been avoiding you both instead of facing you, like a coward. But now I see that it was inevitable we would have to discuss what happened.”

“What exactly happened?” Meis asks in confusion, an eyebrow raised.

“Our people were captured because of my incompetence,” Lio gets out, the guilt of failure weighing heavily upon him, “Everything you two had worked for, what you gave me to protect was destroyed because I failed.” Looking them in the eyes with full remorse, he concludes, “You two almost lost your lives because I could not protect you and allowed Freeze Force to find us; I am so sorry.”

He deserves their rage.

There is no need for them to be so concerned for his sake.

All he has earned is their hatred and scorn.

Their friendship was something he was never supposed to have.

“…What the heck?”

Eyes widening, he looks over to Gueira, who has the most puzzled look on his face.

“Boss, what?” He says, “Like, what?”

“You think we blamed you for what happened?” Meis asks, his gaze full of empathy. “Boss, no…”

“Freeze Force got us ‘cause that old fart sold us out.” Gueira tries to argue. “You didn’t know that would happen!”

“We never blamed you,” Meis pleads, “You did everything right, shit just happens sometimes.” Smiling gently, he adds, “We’re just glad you survived. We’re glad you’re here.”

…

…They’re lying.

They have to be, it doesn’t make sense.

He was their leader and he failed to carry out his responsibilities.

They were exposed to the failure he actually was, they should be repulsed by him

And now he doesn’t even have the power to defend others with.

They have to be lying.

“There is no need to lie to spare my feelings.”

That sends a sudden wave of shock to the other three around him.

Taking advantage of the silence, he continues, “There is no point in trying to absolve me of my mistakes, you mustn’t lie to keep me from facing the consequences that I have earned.”

Blinking, Gueira eventually finds his voice and yells, “What the fuck, man?! We just said it wasn’t yer fault, we’re not lyin’!”

“Why are you so convinced we’re mad?” Meis asks with more control over himself, not much.

Balling his fists, Lio starts again, “It would make no sense for you two to-”

“Lio.”

Galo calls out firmly, “Quit projecting onto everyone else.”

…

“That’s what all this is, right?” He asks, looking down. “You blame yourself for what happened, so you think everyone else should too.” Balling his own fists, Galo looks up and tells him, “Well we’re not going to! None of that was your fault! And everything that was, you’ve already been punished for it, so quit trying to kill yourself to make up for something you didn’t do!”

…

…Now Galo’s lying too.

“I’m sorry,” Lio starts, “But I won’t listen to your lies.”

Before anyone can stop him, he’s running out the door.

 _“Boss!/ Lio!”_ He hears called out behind him.

They’re lying.

There’s no way they could look at him with anything besides contempt.

They can’t love him.

There’s nothing about him that’s worth loving.

His invincible flames are gone.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Galo managed to catch up to him, but Lio locked the bathroom door behind him.

 _“Lio!”_ He hears called out, _“You can’t just take off with no one watching you! I had to text, like, super fast to keep the cops from asking why your ankle monitor was on the move by itself!”_

Maybe it’d be better if he was in prison.

“Lio…” Galo says from behind the door.

“Can I have my work back now?” Lio asks from where he keeps his head on his knees, legs braced by his arms. “We did everything you wanted, so I win.”

Sighing, he hears Galo slip down to the floor and mutter, _“Technically, we didn’t buy anything…”_

“Technically I didn’t want anything,” Lio shoots back. “I need to help my people.”

“No,” Galo dismisses gently, “You don’t.”

“…”

“They’ve found their footing, they can take care of themselves now. You can let them.”

“…”

“You’re the one who needs help now.”

“…”

“You don’t have to take care of anyone, you can let yourself be the one who gets cared for.”

“…”

“I know you don’t want to hear it, but Lio,” Galo says with an audible smile in his voice, “From now on, I’ll take care of you.”

“…”

“I’ll make you food,” the other begins to list off, “Drag you to bed, let you cry on my shoulder, pull you out of your nightmares, buy you every little thing that might make you happy, take you everywhere you wanna go, praise you for every little thing and just…love you. Okay? Can we just do that?”

“…”

“Lio?”

_SLAM!_

Moving to his feet with a yelp, Galo looks straight into the eyes of a furious Lio.

“Is that what’s wrong with you?” Lio asks with pure malice in his voice, “You have to make yourself the hero in every relationship you have, IS THAT IT?!” He screams, scaring Galo into moving back a few steps. “You, _haha_ , you utter idiot!” He chuckles hysterically. “Is that why you took your job? So people wouldn’t have a choice but to like you, you make me sick!”

The frightened look in Galo’s eyes makes him feel shame.

A tiny amount underneath mountains of satisfaction of feeling powerful and getting something done.

“That’s why you followed Kray Foresight for so long, right? So you could have what he had? People who loved you? Well guess what, they never will.”

“Lio-”

“People will turn on you the second you do something they don’t like, no matter what it is. I mean, that bastard’s got the death penalty for what he did. And when I turned Burnish, my whole city went from loving me to hunting me down with pitchforks.”

He needs to stop, this is wrong.

But it feels wonderful.

“You know the public only loves you because of what you do. People who see the real you, they just want you gone. Hell,” he chuckles, “Even I need a break from you sometimes. It almost makes me feel sympathy towards that murdering piece of filth.” Playfulness leaving his tone, he breathes out with utter contempt, “Almost.”

“… _Stop_ …”

“You will never be able to replace the love you lost when your family died, so quit doing things to force people to love you! It’s not the same, idiot!”

He accomplished something.

Is this…victory?

It feels…good.

Staring straight into Galo’s wet eyes, Lio feels strong for the first time in so long.

…The regret overpowers everything else when the first tear slides down Galo’s cheek.

Face softening, he says, “Galo,” quietly as the other man gulps, the tears flowing down his face, hot and fast in all directions.

“I…”

Shaking his head, Galo shows he doesn’t want to hear anything else Lio has to say.

“I didn’t mean…”

“Just because you’re hurting,” Galo says with a wavering voice but determined face after breathing deeply through his nose, leveling a glare at Lio. “That does not mean you get to take it out on me.”

“Galo…”

Turning around, not even looking at Lio, Galo marches to the bedroom and slams the door closed.

…

…Well, he did it.

Opening the door slightly, he peeks in through the crack.

Galo’s laying horizontally on the floor hair fisted in his hands, shoulders shaking with quiet sobs.

Lio succeeded.

Turning around he runs through the apartment, not paying attention to Galo calling his name out in concern, he flings the front door open and runs out, ignoring the pain coursing through his exhausted body, pushing himself forward.

He did it.

He actually did it.

He finally succeeded at something.

Smiling and panting as he runs throughout the city, citizens moving out of his way, he feels pride.

He completely destroyed his relationship with Galo.

Now he doesn’t have a home and food while his people do without.

Galo won’t be there to take away his work, now he can focus on helping them without anyone telling him to stop.

Now Galo won’t delude himself into loving someone as terrible as Lio.

He finally fixed it.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Eventually, he falls.

He tries to get up, but it’s like there’s an invisible weight on top of him, keeping him from getting up.

Looking around as much as he can, he sees he’s at the outskirts of the city, the large and shining newly-restored buildings gone.

…He needs to get up.

He has work to do.

Trying to push himself up, he trembles and pants, breathing heavily.

He can’t stop, he has to keep going.

His people need him.

_No, you’re pretty much useless now._

He’ll make himself useful.

_All you do is mess things up._

That doesn’t mean he has to stop trying.

_You’re just a parasite._

No, he’s just a bad leader.

_Galo’s right, you’re just forcing yourself into things no one needs you for._

He can still provide assistance.

_Just so you can pretend you still have a reason to stay alive._

His life…is for the Burnish.

_They don’t need it._

…They have it all the same.

Getting to his feet, he loses his balance for a few seconds before he finds his footing and gets himself walking, swaying like a drunkard.

He has work to do.

His people can’t afford to waste time on him if he cannot provide.

He may not understand this new world he’s brought them to, but he will learn to.

If an eight-year-old could learn how to survive and try to protect his people, then an adult should learn how to help them adjust to the modern world.

Even if they’ve managed to understand things without him, he will still assist.

This world may have more to offer, but it still has challenges.

If his people suffer in it, it is a sign of his failings.

It’s cold, like he feels.

Inside, outside.

Like he is.

Cruel to the ones who give him love.

He must protect them, but he mustn’t overstep his boundaries.

He is here to protect.

He does not have the right to friendship.

He does not deserve love.

The cold suits him. He will bear it all so that no one else will ever feel it.

_Flames…_

There’s flames, right there.

He begins to walk to them.

He has to finish the proposal, see to some relief funds-

_Flames._

-Get better housing plans written up, learn how the hell PowerPoint works-

_Flames._

-Figure out basic knowledge and skills from what he remembers of his interrupted education-

_Flames._

-Speak to the Burnish on behalf of Burning Rescue, try to build a better relationship-

_Flames._

-Learn how to be a halfway decent leader and help his people stop lasing out-

_Flames._

-Find _something_ he can do at work instead of just sitting there so he doesn’t go back to prison-

_Flames._

-Stop hurting people, he doesn’t have to be a complete monster-

_Flames._

-Stop being so goddamn cold all the time, why is it so cold?!

_Flames._

He needs flames.

That’s it, that’s why he can’t do anything.

Even if they caused him pain, they gave him purpose.

The only thing he could ever do was burn, but now that he can’t he’s useless.

The Promare’s gone, but he will find a way.

He has to.

He will burn.

He will be strong again.

He will have the right to live again.

He enters the flames.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

It’s…hot.

It’s finally hot.

There’s no cold around him, and the cold inside of him is starting to melt.

Looking around, seeing the flames engulf his surroundings, it feels…right.

This is right.

This is how it was meant to be.

It’s getting harder to breathe, but the pain is wonderful.

This is how he’ll help his people.

The flames, they’ll help guide him.

They will lead him where he needs to go.

It’s fate.

_“Lio!”_

They’re calling him.

_“Lio! Lio!”_

He walks further into them.

They’ll take him with them.

“LIO!”

Warmth, warmth is pulling him away from the flames.

What?

Why is it taking him away?

“LIO! Damn, it Lio, stop!”

Are the flames rejecting him? Has he failed them too?

But…he’s their…they’re everything he has.

He’s useless without them.

They have to lead him, he can’t do anything if they don’t.

No.

No.

“NO! NO NO NO NO NO NO!!!”

He tries to reach out to the shrinking flames but he’s being pulled away. He tries to get the warmth to let go but it won’t budge.

“It’s okay Lio,” The warmth tells him, “It’s gonna be okay.”

He can’t get out and the flames are evaporating, doused by water and ice.

Like him.

His fire’s gone.

He feels himself land on the sidewalk, the warmth unable to hold him any longer, hears panting near him as something falls.

He hears sirens, a fire truck is stopped at the building.

He’s carried to it, people are asking him questions, but it sounds like static.

A rebreather mask is pressed onto his face, he doesn’t register who’s putting it on, but he doesn’t care anymore.

He can’t do anything.

He’s been rejected by the one thing he ever had.

He’ll never be able to do anything but fail.

He’s been rejected by his own destiny.

It was too late.

Teal eyes brimming with tears are the first thing he registers, the words coming out the mouth that they share a face with are lost in his ringing ears.

Galo.

Galo’s the warmth.

Galo pulled him out.

Again.

Galo saved him.

He…

Ruined everything.

“Why?” Lio manages to shudder out.

“Lio?” He vaguely hears Galo say, but he doesn’t care.

Panting, he grits out, “Why…can’t…”

“Lio, what’s wrong, why are you-”

“WHY WON’T YOU JUST STOP?!” He demands, ripping the mask off and limping angrily to Galo, pushing away anyone he registers coming near him.

“Lio, stop!” Galo tries to warn, “You shouldn’t be moving around, you were-”

He goes silent when Lio pulls him to his feet by his upper arms, hands clutching with a grip powered by pure adrenaline.

“Why are you always getting in my way?!” Lio demands. “Why can’t you ever just leave me alone?!”

Blinking in shock, Galo recovers and yells in concern, “You were going to burn alive!”

“That’s the point!”

“…What?” Galo asks, uncharacteristically muted, face as white as a sheet, pupils blown back.

“I was supposed to give my life for the Burnish!” Lio roars, not listening to anything around him. “But it didn’t happen! That was the one certainty of my life, my destiny and I couldn’t even do that! What am I supposed to do now?!”

“Lio…” Galo whimpers, tears falling without a care.

“I was supposed to die.” He says, head dropping down, voice shaken. “I accepted that my life would be taken, and I accepted it if it meant my people would live another day.” Raising his head back up, he looks at Galo without really seeing him. “How am I supposed to live after that?”

Galo doesn’t answer.

“Why should I still be alive if I can’t help my people anymore?”

“Lio.”

Narrowing his brows in determination, tears still streaming down his face, Galo says without a hint of doubt, “You deserve to live, because you’re alive.”

…

“…That’s ridiculous.”

He’d elaborate, but he can’t.

His grip loosens.

His knees buckle.

He falls.

He hears screaming somewhere, but darkness is spreading throughout his senses.

Is this what it’s like to be a fire that’s being put out?

That’s what he is.

He was a flame once.

The person he once was has been put out, he realizes as he fades into unconsciousness.

Now he’s just the ashes.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And with the flash passed, the flames die out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for taking so long to update! I will do my best to be quicker with updates from here on out!

It’s cold again, dark and cold.

Forcing his eyes open, he closes them again at the bright light.

_Beep._

Sitting up immediately, his eyes opening wide in shock, he finally sees his surroundings.

White, white everywhere.

Cold, it’s cold.

There’s machines everywhere, what are they hooked into- It’s him. They’re hooked into him.

_Beep! Beep! Beep!_

There’s something in his arm, something on his face, who caught him?

_BeepBeeepBeeep!_

Where are the others?

He can hear running down the halls, why did the scientists leave him? He’ll get out of here, they can’t stop him.

_BEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEP!_

He rips whatever they attached to him off, but the flames aren’t coming, why aren’t they coming?

Where happened to the others?!

“Mr. Fotia! Mr. Fotia, please calm down!”

The scientists are back, they can’t keep him down, where are the flames?!

“You are safe, you need to stay still sir!”

_BEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEP!_

The flash of white coats, _blood, bloodstains on their coats_ , someone has a needle.

“What did you do to the others?!” He demands, cold, _ice on the walls._

“Sir, there are no others, please get down!”

He tries to rise but hands are pushing him down, _freeze guns_ , there’s a needle, he tries to move away but the hands are strong, _they called in Freeze Force._

**_BEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEP!_ **

“Prep the sedative, now!”

“Sir, there is no Freeze Force!”

He screams, why aren’t the flames coming, how did they get captured, where is everyone else?!

Something’s stabbed into his skin, but his flames aren’t coming out to fight it.

The hands are off of him, but they’ve started spinning the room around him, his eyelids are getting heavy, WHERE ARE THE FLAMES?!

“There we go, just go to sleep…”

_Beep…Beeep…Beep…_

“What did…” He tries to say as the darkness creeps into his vision, “What did you do to…the Burnish, where are the…”

Is the last thing he can get out before he’s pulled back into the cold expanse of the dark, the red eyes of Kray Foresight burning into his vision.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

“Excuse me, where is Mr. Thymos? He was just here before we went to Mr. Fotia’s room.”

“He had to use the bathroom.”

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

_“Grrk…”_

Is all Galo can get out before he’s pukin’ his guts out.

It’s a stress thing, ever since he was a kid, ever since the…

Fire.

Mama, Papa.

Lio…Lio, he…

_“Guuh…”_

Annnnnd, there’s round two.

This goes on for…he doesn’t really know how long, kinda busy saying goodbye to his lunch.

Lio…Lio doesn’t want to…he wouldn’t…he’s upset, but…

Lio’s strong, he wouldn’t let himself…Not if other people needed him…He’s just…not thinking straight. Yeah, he’s just a little confused, he’ll get better.

They’ll pull through, yeah! Galo’s burning soul will get Lio out of his funk! …And probably into a therapist’s office. Like they should’ve put him in months ago.

Everytime Galo brought it up, Lio shot it down, said therapists were too scarce, especially ones that were willing to work with Burnish so he didn’t want to take any time that could be used for anyone else.

Galo let him drop it, knew that if he tried to press it any further Lio would freak out and run off.

And Lio can’t…he can’t leave…

The Burnish need him.

Galo needs him.

Galo needed to help him.

Galo should have saved him!

He was going through something, Galo needed to push harder!

But, Lio would have run off!

Damn it, he couldn’t save someone who’s living in the same freakin’ apartment!

The hands are going in the hair, pulling as much as his shaky arms can manage, the motion not doing anything good for his stomach but he’s not paying attention.

 _Keep it together_ , he thinks to himself, _Lio needs you to have it together right now. Push through it! Burn this negativity with your firefighter’s soul, Thymos!_

Lio’s gonna be fine, Galo’s going to fix everything and save him from himself.

He can do it, he can’t afford not to!

 ~~If Lio goes away~~ \- No! Don’t think about that! Pull through!

…Would he go where everyone else who leaves goes?

_“Nngh!”_

Bile’s comin’ up his throat again.

While he tries to keep it down, he hears the door to the stall open. Whipping his head around, mentally cursing himself for aggravating the shit in his neck, he meets the cool gaze of the captain looking down at him from where he’s hunched over the toilet filled up with his lunch.

Trying to smile, coming out more like a grimace, he says, “Eh…Guess Lio was right, clams were a bad idea, hehehe.”

“…”

Why is the captain here?

Has he been taking too long? He shouldn’t waste time, when Lio wakes up…

From running into a fire.

Lio could have died in a fire.

_House is on fire, Mama! Papa! Where are you?!_

_Lio’s breaking up, he’s gonna disappear!_

_~~DON’T GO!~~ _

Puke’s reached his mouth, he tries to hold it in, but it’s getting worse, so he ends up turning his head and dumping his fries out.

He feels a hand on his back halfway through it.

Pausing the evacuation of whatever’s left in his stomach, he turns and sees the captain seated next to him on the hospital floor, an oddly gentle look on his face as he rubs circles into Galo’s bare back. Before Galo can say anything, his mouth’s filled up again and he’s turning his head back to the porcelain and lining it with his stomach contents again.

After a few more minutes of dry heaving, he starts to catch his breath. The captain pats him on the back and flushes his lunch down, handing him some tissue to wipe his mouth with.

“Is…” He tries to say, slurring a bit, “Any updates on Lio?”

“We were waiting on you,” the captain assures him as he gets to his feet, “You ready to go?”

Not trusting his mouth (for once) he nods and slowly moves into a standing position, swaying all the while. He can hardly walk, barely making it to the entrance where the captain’s waiting for him, wrapping an arm around his shoulders to steady him and beginning the walk back to the waiting area.

Lio’s gonna be okay.

He has to be.

Galo’s going to save him this time.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

“Wait, what?!”

“Shortly after he woke up,” the doctor repeats, “Mr. Fotia experienced a panic attack. We attempted to calm him down, but we arrived too late and our efforts were utterly useless.” Sighing, they push their glasses up their nose and continue, “So we were forced to sedate him before he could seriously hurt himself.”

“Look,” Galo starts, “Lio doesn’t like hospitals, so he was probably definitely going to freak out when he woke up. You need to keep someone he knows in the room or have a doctor or nurse there 24/7 to explain things to him before he gets lost in his head.”

“We’ll keep that in mind,” the doctor agrees with a nod, “As for when he’ll be expected to wake up…that’s where things get complicated.”

“Huh?!” Galo grunts, eyebrows raising up his head, “What’s going on?!”

“Tell me,” the doctor asks with a leveled gaze, “How has Mr. Fotia been sleeping lately?”

“Huh?”

“Has he been experiencing any bouts of insomnia? Or has he been trying to avoid sleeping in general?”

“…Kinda.”

“I see,” they note, writing something down and looking through their notes, “That adds up, okay: Mr. Fotia is clearly experiencing an extreme case of exhaustion and his body has finally shut down. Basically, he’s fallen asleep.”

“Oh.” Galo says in realization. “That…makes sense.”

“Yes, and luckily, he was pulled out of the smoke before any real damage could occur, so he should be fine when he wakes up.”

“Oh thank you so much,” Galo breathes out in relief, his whole body slouching from the pressure being lifted off. “So, can I just take him home?” He asks once he gets over the moment.

“Oh, absolutely not.”

Jumping up at being dismissed, Galo’s just about to start arguing again before the doctor cuts him off, “Even if what caught up to him was exhaustion, the fact still stands that Mr. Fotia attempted-”

“He wasn’t trying to do that!” Galo immediately interrupts with a glare. “Lio would never do that!”

“Sir…”

Looking to the ground, Galo adds, “He was just…He just wasn’t thinking straight.”

“…In any case,” the doctor says carefully, “He’s still clearly suffering from malnutrition and will need to be monitored once he wakes up for any signs of health issues. His body, like many other former Burnish is highly susceptible to illness, and his apparent indifference towards his own health has only made him more vulnerable, so we need to keep an eye on his vitals at the very least.”

“…Sure.”

“We’ll let you know if his condition changes, for now, go home and get some rest.” And with that, the doctor turns and walks down the hall until they disappear from Galo’s sight.

Turning around, Galo heads back to the waiting room, the other members of the team looking up at the sound of his footsteps.

“Okay!” Galo announces with a smile and clap. “Lio’s sleeping right now and the doctors couldn’t find anything serious, so yeah! We’re in the clear!” Looking over their worried faces, Galo nervously adds, “But, they wanna check him for some stuff and they’re not sure when he’s gonna wake up, so…we’ll just see what happens!”

Giving him a concerned glance, Remi gently says, “Galo…”

“Don’t worry!” Galo advises as he flops down onto a seat. “Lio’ll pull through!” Hopping to his feet, balancing on the chair, he declares with crossed arms, “His soul burns just as brightly as mine! He’s not gonna let a little smoke keep him down!”

Varys, looking slightly shocked, tries to say, “Galo, he tried to-”

“He was just tired and not thinking straight.” Galo shuts down instantly.

Varys opens his mouth to say something again, but Lucia shakes her head, urging him to take the hint.

Satisfied, Galo slides back down into his chair.

“Here.”

Looking up, he sees Aina smiling at him tiredly with a cup of water in her hands.

“Thanks,” he tells her and takes the offered drink gratefully, relishing the cool liquid going down his raw throat.

“Take it slow,” she advises as she settles into a seat next to him.

Nodding, he finishes and pops his mouth off of the drink with a loud sigh of appreciation.

“So,” Aina starts again, “Do you need a ride home? I can run you by your place real quick.”

“Nah,” Galo rejects, tossing the cup into the trash, “I’m gonna wait for Lio.”

Silence falls but Galo pretends not to notice, smile ready to take on the world.

“Um, Galo?”

“Yeah?”

“Are you…” Aina trails off, “…Okay?”

“Huh?” He grunts in surprise.

“I mean…Lio…kinda said some… _stuff_ before he passed out, and you seemed…upset over the phone when you asked us if we saw him.”

“Oh.” He says in surprise. “Oh! Uh, we had a little fight before he left but we’re gonna work it out!” Smiling at the concerned faces around him, he tries to look reassuring. “Don’t worry!”

The others don’t seem to buy it.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

It’s bright.

Squinting his eyes as he tries opening them again, Lio manages to make out the contents of the room he’s in.

He feels…different.

As if he’s cleared away all the things piling up in his mind, the anxiety and stress collecting around him washed away mostly.

He feels…refreshed.

It’s…good.

“Mr. Fotia?”

Turning his head in surprise at the call of his name, he sees a nurse.

“Oh good,” they say when he gives them his attention, “How are you feeling sir?”

“I…” he starts, “I…believe I am…uninjured.”

Chuckling at his response, the nurse continues, “Yes, you didn’t sustain any injuries from the incident and you haven’t shown any complications from smoke inhalation, so I’d say you’re quite a lucky man.”

 _Smoke inhalation?_ Lio thinks to himself. _Why would I- Wait…_

The flames.

Gueira and Meis.

Galo.

…Galo.

How could he say all those horrible things?

Why?

Why would he do that?

Galo…

“Mr. Fotia?”

Regaining awareness, he answers, “Yes?”

“The doctor would like to go over some things with you, are you up to answering some questions?”

“Oh, yes.”

“Good,” they nod, “Now let’s do a few tests and then I’ll call the doctor.”

As the nurse prepares, Lio remembers.

The worry on Gueira and Meis’ faces when he refused to listen to them.

The tears rolling down Galo’s face when Lio told him he was unlovable.

The flames cutting off his oxygen as he ran into them.

Why did he do that?

Why did he run away from them?

Why did he go into a burning building?

Why did he hurt Galo?

Galo…

_I’m so sorry._

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Three days after Lio got hospitalized, Galo gets a call while he’s at work.

“Yellow?”

_“Mr. Thymos, this is Promepolis General Hospital, we are calling to let you know that Lio Fotia has woken up, and is- Sir? Excuse me, what are you- Sir!”_

His phone falls to the ground as he rushes out the station, ignoring everyone calling after him for an explanation.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

“Just let me talk to him!”

“Mr. Thymos,” the doctor tries to reason, “Mr. Fotia has just woken up, we need to take things slowly while we evaluate his state; your presence would hinder that.”

“But-!”

“Sir,” the doctor cuts him off, “Until we say so, Mr. Fotia will not have any visitors? Are we clear?”

“…”

Balling his fists, Galo looks down and mutters, “Fine.”

“Thank you.” The doctor says before turning around and walking away.

“Galo!” He hears called out behind him, meeting the eyes of Aina followed by the rest of the team, greeting him with a chop to the head that knocks him to the ground. “Damn it, don’t just run off like that! You got us worried, idiot!”

Idiot, yeah.

Lio thinks he’s one too.

He made that clear- No! Don’t pay any attention to that! Lio was just really tired and stressed out!

He didn’t mean it.

“Ugh,” he grunts as he shifts into criss cross applesauce and rubs his head, “Sorry.”

“The captain told us what happened,” she explains, “You didn’t have to run here, you could’ve just waited on us!”

“I know, I know, that was dumb.” He acknowledges as he gets up. “I just wanted to get to Lio.”

Anger leaving her expression, Aina sighs. “Of course you did, that’s just you.”

Yup! She gets it.

It’s just him!

 _ ~~Clingy~~_ -Dedicated!

“Regardless,” Remi pipes in, “What did the doctors say?”

“Well so far he’s up and answering questions and everything looks okay,” Galo explains, “But they wanted to check a few things before they let anyone see him.”

This leaves a certain heaviness in the air, one which Galo immediately tries to dispel.

“Hey, it’s all right! Lio’ll be back and at it before we know it!” Closing his eyes and putting his hands on his hips, he nods his head with a smirk, Galo nods, “Lio’s passionately burning soul is way too strong to be taken down by any stupid little fire, he’s probably already getting better now!”

“…”

“…Glad you feel like that,” Remi finally says after a pause.

“Yup! I know Lio better than anyone else, he’ll make it!”

“Speaking of your claim to being a Lio expert,” Lucia jumps in, “The good news is I managed to get up with his friends.”

“That’s great, Lucia!”

“The bad news is,” she continues with a grimace, Vinny sharing her discomfort from atop her head, “I got up with his friends.”

“Vinny.” The rat agrees hesitatingly.

“What’s the probl-”

_“You bastard!”_

Turning their heads towards the yelling isn’t enough to prepare them for Gueira powerwalking towards them, raising his fist as he gets closer to Galo.

“How could you-Get off me!” He demands of Varys when the larger man grabs his arm. “Lemme go!”

“Not if you’re goin’ around like that!” Varys warns. “You need to cool down!”

“Let him go.” Meis echoes, shocking everyone with his sudden presence and intense glare. “Unless you want to wake up without hands.”

“Are you threatening him?” Remi shoots back. “We could easily send you two to prison for-”

“Oh, that’d make it easier,” Gueira says bitterly, “Ya send the crazies away so you can do whatever and let this idiot get away with screwing up Boss!”

“Me?!” Galo yells in disbelief. “What’d I do?!”

“You’re the one who’s always hovering around ‘im!” Gueira yells as he gets his arm free, walking into Galo’s personal space, a finger pointed accusingly at him. “You could have done something but you didn’t!”

“This isn’t Galo’s fault!” Aina shoots back, moving herself between Galo and the Burnish. “Lio’s an adult, he’s responsible for himself! Galo’s not responsible for what Lio chose to do!”

“He never did anything like this when he was with us.” Meis cuts in. “Why’s he doing it now? Huh? Why?”

They…are blaming him.

Huh.

Makes sense, these two look for any excuse they can get to be mad at him.

Even though he SAVED THE WORLD, including them.

Even though he saved Lio.

Nope, Galo’s always the bad guy to them.

Even though HE treats Lio like a person instead of some mystical perfect shepherd who’s not allowed to make mistakes and hasn’t made him hate himself for not living up to Galo’s expectations.

But they’re Lio’s friends and they’ve suffered with him through stuff Galo couldn’t even imagine, so it makes sense they’d be suspicious of him.

And even if he didn’t mean to, he _kinda_ supported a government regime that brutalized and vilified their people.

And they _definitely_ know more about Lio than he does.

Yeah, this is GALO’S fault.

…Aw, fuck that!

“Because he couldn’t.” Galo grits out, looking at the floor with balled fists.

“What?!” Gueira calls out.

“You wanna repeat that?” Meis asks with a threatening tone.

“…Yeah, I do.” Galo answers, lifting his head. “Lio couldn’t let himself act like a vulnerable human being around you guys because he was scared you guys would think it’d mean he was too weak to lead the Burnish!” Glaring, he adds, “He thought he had to carry every single Burnish on his back because I don’t know! Maybe because everyone he met just decided to put him in charge because he was stronger, like it was something he wanted, and let him decide everything, but oh no! Something went wrong! But Lio was in charge so it’s his fault! And he can’t let anyone know how shitty he feels because he can’t be a failure _and_ a wimp, now can he?!”

“You. Shut. Up.” Meis says with a bite in his voice.

“You don’t know anything so fuck off!” Gueira yells in agreement.

“Everyone,” Aina grits out, “Just cool down.”

Nodding, Remi tries to say, “Let’s all take a second and-”

“Maybe you two are the ones that don’t know anything!” Galo yells back, cutting Remi off.

This actually stuns them.

Along with the rescue team.

Wow. So this is what it’s like to be in control of an argument.

Not important.

“I know you guys love Lio,” he says to the two, “And I know you understand him in ways I don’t know, things I might never know, and that’s okay. Lio needs you.” Narrowing his brows, he continues, “But there are things about him you two have no idea about, things I _do_ know about him you two don’t, so don’t act like you’re the only ones that can help him. Because you’re not, because you guys messed up too.”

Silence falls.

The group is in awe, and Galo laments briefly that this is what he had to do to impress everyone.

Whatever, Lio’s more important than any of that anyway.

“Excuse me.”

Turning their heads, they see a nurse approaching.

“Mr. Fotia is ready for visitors, but he asked to speak to see Mr. Thymos privately first. Is that alright?”

Turning to see everyone else before getting a nod from the captain, Galo turns back and says, “Sure, take me to Lio.”

“Right this way.”

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Lio’s…small.

It’s easy to forget, he usually commands such a presence that he makes everyone around him feel like they’re two feet tall. But right now, sitting up on a hospital bed, gown showing the skin wrapped tightly around his bones, looking down at his hands, it’s the first thought that comes to Galo’s mind.

Right after running down the hall and slamming the door open and yelling, “LIO!” in relief and excitement. Once he gets inside, he loses himself briefly in happiness and heads straight over to Lio, jumping over the foot of the bed with arms wide open for a hug before he sees Lio flinch, making him stop in mid-air and flop down next to him on the bed.

“Sorry,” Galo says into the bed as he adjusts himself into a sitting position, “I got kinda carried away.”

“It’s fine,” Lio reassures, voice calm and eyes clear of eyebags, making Galo melt with relief internally.

“Okay,” Galo says with a smile, “How are you feelin’?”

“My…head is clear, for the first time in a while.” Lio answers, hesitating. “I feel better rested now.”

“That’s good!” Galo cheers, smile bright. “Glad to hear it!”

“Why?”

“Huh?”

“Why are you glad that I’m okay?” Lio asks accusingly.

“Because...I love you?” Galo suggests with a shrug.

“I told you that you were an annoying parasite that only helps others to make people love him because no one likes who you are as a person.” Lio retorts. “How anyone could place my wellbeing as important after that is mystifying.”

“Lio,” Galo tries to start with a smile and sympathetic voice, “You were just tired and your head was all mixed up because you’ve been working so hard lately, you didn’t mean it!”

“Do not make excuses for me.”

Eyes widening, Galo can’t get anything out.

“What I said to you was,” Lio tries to find the words, looking down at his hands with shame, “Beyond awful. I said such horrible things and I enjoyed watching you become hurt. I enjoyed hurting you. I wanted to hurt you and I used what I knew was your weakest point and twisted it to satisfy a desire to have power over you.” Turning his head back to face Galo, he concludes, “I am…so sorry. I am so deeply sorry that I hurt you.”

“Lio-”

“But you shouldn’t forgive me.”

“…”

“You have shared your home with me, risked your life to prevent me from going against my own morals, saved my life and attempted to make me a part of your own and I responded by insulting you and accusing you of such awful things. And instead of trying to apologize, I ran away with satisfaction that I hurt you so badly. I did this when you only wished to help me. I have done nothing to earn your forgiveness and I know that I do not deserve it.”

“…You’re right.”

Eyes widening in shock, Lio’s caught off by Galo’s admission.

“What you said,” Galo starts, “Was…beyond terrible, and you did not have the right to say it at all.” Taking a breath and leveling a look at Lio, he continues, “And yeah, you really hurt me, Lio. Then you just ran away instead of trying to fix it. That was awful. I felt awful.”

Taking a look at Lio’s shocked expression, he sighs before giving him a soft smile.

“But I’ve heard worse.”

Lio’s eyes are so wide they look like gumballs.

“Yeah, right? What you said was pretty bad, but I’ve gotten worse stuff yelled at me before. And you didn’t even say sorry afterwards, but the fact that you’re doing it now already puts you leagues ahead of everyone else who’s ever dissed me, so yeah! Not that bad!”

“…Galo…”

“I’m not saying you didn’t do something totally shitty,” Galo clarifies before Lio can cut him off, “Trust me, you should definitely feel bad about it. But that’s the thing: You feel bad. Alot of people don’t. And you really were stressed the heck out, so you weren’t in your right mind, dude.” Placing a hand near Lio’s, he continues, “I know there’s no way in hell you’d say something like that now, right?”

Blinking, Lio answers, “Yes.”

“See? You messed up, but you can fix it! I know you man, and you’re not a bad guy, we just gotta work on that fuse of yours!” Gracing Lio with understanding eyes, he continues, “This is what couples do. I think. They have fights and then they take some time to think about it and talk it over. It’s okay.”

“How can you…” Lio says in shock, “How can you just forgive me for everything?! Why can’t you stay mad with anyone?!” Taking on a desperate edge, he says, “How can you be so understanding, after everything you’ve been through?”

“Dunno,” Galo shrugs with closed eyes and a smile, “Too much of an idiot to learn how to hold grudges, I guess.”

Making an annoyed sound, Lio says, “You’re not an idiot, Galo Thymos.”

“See?! When you’ve got a clear head, you say nice stuff like that! That’s why I know you’re not a bad guy, Lio.”

“…I really am sorry.”

“I know. And I really do love you.”

Galo wishes that it could stay be that simple, where Lio accepts what he says and takes in all the love Galo has to give.

Looking him in the eyes, Galo knows that he won’t get that wish granted.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

He’s surrounded.

After his talk with Galo, Captain Ex came in, accompanied by Gueira and Meis, Galo remaining in the room, now off the bed.

He can’t escape.

“I wasn’t trying to kill myself.”

That’s the only thing he can think to say.

Gueira and Meis sigh in relief at that, Gueira just about melting onto the floor.

Not entirely convinced, the captain presses, “You ran into a burning building and yelled that you were supposed to be dead.”

“I was…not within a sound state of mind,” Lio tries to reason, “I was not thinking straight, but I did not go in there with the intention of dying.”

“Well what were you thinking?”

He was thinking of flames.

He was thinking of his uselessness.

He was thinking of the leader he used to be.

“It’s…not important.”

“If it wasn’t important,” the captain argues, “Then we wouldn’t be having this conversation.”

“We’re having this conversation,” Lio shoots back, “Because you are concerning yourself with insignificant details.”

“Boss,” Meis softly cuts in, worry leaking out of his eye, “You nearly burned alive.”

“That…is not something for you to concern yourselves with.”

“Bullshit!” Gueira yells. “You’re our Boss! You can’t just up and die on us!”

“My death is inevitable,” Lio argues “As is yours and everyone else’s, but I will devote my time alive to providing for the Burnish. And when my death comes, I will only wish that my work has alleviated our burden as much as it could.”

That is his fate.

He’s always known this.

“That’s- What?!” Gueira splutters. “Boss, we don’t want that!”

“We want you to live,” Meis agrees, “And enjoy your life with the rest of us. You can’t just work your ass off tryin’ ta make things better and keep yourself out of it!”

“My personal comfort is of no importance,” Lio says, “My life’s value is found in providing for our people, I should not waste my time on my own pleasure. Now,” he starts as he begins to get up, “I have work to do.”

“No you don’t.”

Turning to Meis in shock, the taller man continues, “We talked to a bunch of the guys, we’re takin’ care of everything you’re signed on to.”

What?

“What?”

“Boss,” Gueira tries to reason, “You’re workin’ yourself to the bone! We’ll handle it.”

No, no he can’t do that.

“That’s,” he tries to argue, “The others are still recovering from what happened, they need time-”

“You need time,” Captain Ex interrupts, “Which is why I talked to your parole board. We’re shortening your hours. The rest of the time is going to be taken up by you getting counseling.”

They can’t just…he’s already useless, they can’t just…

“…Counseling?”

“Lio,” Galo finally speaks, solemnly.

“We’re putting you in therapy.”

…

“You need help.” Galo continues, “Like, alot of help.”

“…That’s ridiculous.” Lio finally says.

“Lio…”

“I will not allow you to waste resources on me that the others clearly need more,” Lio begins, “And I will not have my responsibilities taken away because of one lapse in judgement. I appreciate your concern, but it is unwarranted.”

“Lio!” Galo says in concern while Gueira and Meis have gone pale with…fear? “You need to stop! You pushed yourself into a hospital bed because you wouldn’t! This is not good for you!”

That’s not important.

“I’m in here,” Lio pushes back, anger flaring, “Because I made a mistake! A mistake that I made because I was not taking care of my responsibilities!”

A mistake that cost him time he could’ve spent helping his people.

“That wasn’t it at all!”

Yes it was.

“You don’t understand!”

I can’t make you.

“I understand that you’d rather work yourself to death instead of taking the time to deal with your own problems because you think everything is your fault when it’s not!”

Yes it is.

“The Burnish are my responsibility!”

They always have been and always will be.

“You’re my responsibility!”

You don’t want to do that to yourself.

“I never agreed to that!”

You could do so much better.

“Like you agreed to taking care of the Burnish?!”

There was no choice in that matter.

“I have to!”

It’s his purpose in life.

“No you don’t, there’s more people that can help now!”

Why would you take it away from me?

“Why are you always getting in my way?!”

You’re just going to hurt yourself.

“Why won’t you stop?!”

I can’t.

“I can’t stop!”

I can’t.

“Why not?!”

I don’t know how.

“It’s not important!”

Quit worrying yourself with me.

“Then tell me!”

No.

“Stay out of it!”

You’ve done enough.

Pulling Galo back, Captain Ex looks Lio over, the smaller panting and huffing from the yelling.

“You really don’t want to go?” The older man asks.

Raising an eyebrow, Lio asks, “Excuse me?”

“Captain, no!” Galo yells from the man’s arms. “He needs this!”

“Hold him,” the captain orders Gueira and Meis, the two obeying in shock.

Approaching the bed, the man reaches into his jacket and pulls out a notepad and pen.

“Here.” Tossing the items onto the bed, he looks at Lio with a calm gaze.

“Write down one thing you like about yourself, and you don’t have to go.” The man says simply.

“…You can’t choose whether I go or not.” Lio retorts.

“Hate to tell you this, but it’s therapy or the board sends you to an insane asylum.”

“Lio…” Galo says, worried.

Pausing to glare at the captain briefly, he picks up the offered writing materials and prepares to write.

Something.

There’s something he can write.

Then he can get back to work.

He’s got so much to do.

He’ll talk to Gueira and Meis, get his work back, the others shouldn’t worry themselves so much.

He needs to take care of them.

Even if he is useless.

Even if he got them hurt.

Even if he’s living a life of comfort and ease while the others suffer.

He just needs to stop wasting time.

Just, write something down.

He’s…

Useless.

No, not that.

Pathetic.

No.

Selfish.

No! Just, write something!

Anything, it doesn’t matter!

Do _something_ for once!

“Give it to me.”

At that utterance, everyone turns their heads to Galo, the man’s head turned downwards.

At the questioning look of the captain, Galo takes a breath and says, “When he’s done writing it, give it to me.”

“Galo…”

“Lio…doesn’t lie to me. He never lies to me.” Balling his fists, he turns his head showing a face with tears leaking out of a set of determined eyes. “So give it to me when he’s done writing it, because if he does we’ll know he’s not lying.”

…

Damn it.

Damn it, damn it, damn it!

They’re wasting time!

He has work to do!

People need him!

Why can’t they all just get out of his way?!

_Flames._

There’s so much he needs to _flames_ do, he can’t waste anymore time!

_Failure._

Why are they so concerned with him, he’s the one who _failure_ ’s ruining things!

_Flames, failure._

Just let him go _flames,_ let him do something _failure_!

_Flames failure, flames failure, flames failure…_

He knows, he knows useless _flames failure, flames failure_ , but he still needs to do something!

_Flames failure flames failure flames failure flames failure_

He _flames_ just _failure_ needs _flames_ to _failure_ …

_Flamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailureflamesfailure_

…He can’t do it.

_FWOOM!_

The dying sparks of the flames, is he the only one that heard the flames fan out, the flames that make him who he is, is he the only one who heard it burst out one last time before fizzling into nothing, the dying sparks leaking out his eyes? Is he the only one?

The sparks drip onto the blanket, the paper, wet and full, falling out of his eyes as his heart clenches in vain trying to keep any spark it can find alive, any excuse to keep himself going-

It’s pointless.

There’s no reason he should be here.

There’s no reason he should be here, surrounded by concerned faces, Galo’s tears of sympathy being shed along his own, the pen falling onto the blanket with the water falling from his eyes as he sucks in a breath and begins to wail.

“Boss…”

He doesn’t deserve any of this.

He can’t do anything.

He doesn’t understand how the world works, his people know it so much better than he does when he’s supposed to be protecting them.

Gueira and Meis are supposed to hate him, there’s no reason they shouldn’t, he ruined everything.

He took away their only protection, the flames are gone.

He could never keep them safe, he failed his purpose in life, one he should have appreciated more while he still had it.

He’s found a man who’s deluded himself into loving him, giving constantly while Lio only takes.

He’s facing his people with envy when they have already suffered so much, fearing they are moving on without him.

He’s been given everything but misses the time where his people suffered to satisfy his own desires for a purpose.

He was to give his life for his people, but he couldn’t even do that and they were the ones who suffered.

There’s nothing left of the strong person he pretended to be, all that’s left are the ashes of a monster who couldn’t help anyone, who could only hurt everyone around him.

He hears Galo fall to his knees just barely over his screams.

He’s failed.

There’s no reason for him to still be alive.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

“Hello again, Mr. Fotia.” Dr. Bievve greets as she enters the hospital room.

He lifts his head slightly at her arrival, regarding her with red-rimmed eyes.

It feels like he cried for hours, right there in front of everyone before they left the room.

He doesn’t really care.

He’s already accepted he’s a failure, they should too.

“I suppose this is quite humorous,” he says dully, “I rejected your help and now it’s mandatory. Funny.”

He laughs a little, the doctor not showing any visible signs of discomfort at his outburst.

“Sorry if I sound a little curt,” the doctor says, “But I don’t find mental health problems all that funny.”

“That’s fair,” Lio responds with a shrug, returning to a slouch on the bed.

“Okay, well let’s try and get started. I guess we should start with some basics for now.” Taking a seat, she begins, “So, how do you feel? Generic, I know, but it’s good for breaking up some of the tension and helping to give me a general idea of what we need to work on.”

“Hmmm…” Lio hums as he rolls his head from side to side. “I feel…doused.”

“‘Doused?’” She repeats, an eyebrow raised in confusion.

“Yes,” he confirms without any sense of urgency, “Like everything that made me up’s been put out and all that’s left are the ashes, scattered on the ground and accomplishing nothing.”

“So, you feel like you’ve lost your purpose in life, yes?”

“No, more like…” He trails off, looking at the ceiling, clicking his tongue, “I’ll never be able to do it because I’m such a failure. Because I’m a complete failure, you know.”

“You, think you’re a failure?”

“Yeah, obviously.” He says in a state of enlightenment. “My purpose in life was to protect the Burnish and I failed. I was stronger, so of course I had to protect them, but I couldn’t. They all got captured, injured, killed because I was a failure.” Nodding to himself, he adds, “And now I don’t have the power to keep them safe, and I don’t understand how to lead them through a peaceful life, so I failed it again.” Looking Dr. Bievve in the eyes with his blown back ones he concludes, “They should just get rid of me.”

“…”

“If I can’t do anything, I shouldn’t be alive.”

“So,” Dr. Bievve tries to start, “Do you want to die, Mr. Fotia?”

Humming a bit, he eventually shakes his head, “I’m indifferent to death, as long as I’m out of everyone’s way I couldn’t care less of why I am.”

“I see,” she notes, writing something down on her clipboard. “Have you considered how saying things like this affects those around you?”

“I don’t see why it’d be a big deal,” he shrugs, “I can’t do anything for anyone, so I think they’d actually be happy if I just died one day.”

“Even Galo?”

“That’s the best part,” he says with an air of wonder, “If I was gone, Galo could finally have enough time to realize that he doesn’t really love me.”

“Does he do things that make you feel unloved in your relationship?”

“No!” He snorts, chuckling a bit before he starts talking again. “No, no, no. Galo’s…he fell for this idealized version of me that he’s deluded himself into believing is real. No, Galo is…beyond wonderful, he just thinks I’m someone I’m not.”

“Do you have any idea who that is?”

“Oh sure,” he confirms with slight enthusiasm, “His Lio is kind, responsible, smart, strong, understanding, reliable and can accomplish things. So…the exact opposite of what I am, as you can see.”

“Mr. Fotia, I believe you view yourself in an unnecessarily negative light and that could be a major factor to your current state.”

“WELL WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM?!” He explodes, pushing himself in her direction, misjudging his reach and faceplanting before rising up in fury.

“Someone who’s being very unfair to himself, in all honesty.”

“Don’t you get it?!” He demands. “There’s no reason to be kind, I don’t deserve it!” Chuckling, hysterically, he adds, “I had _one_ reason for my life and I failed! I’m supposed to protect my people, but I can’t! All that power and all I could do with it was hurt people who didn’t know what was going on! I still do that! So in the end I just turned out to be a monster who fails everyone!”

“Sir, you’re-”

“A failure!” He screams, not listening, tears returning as his face shifts into a sorrowful one. “A monster, a waste of time, an ungrateful bastard, what else do you want to hear?!” Clutching his arms, he falls onto his side and begins sobbing into the sheets.

He thinks she tries to say something after this.

He doesn’t hear it.

He knows the truth.

He’s already given up.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

“Fuck!” Gueira yells as he punches the wall. “Shit, fuck, damn it all!”

After they got hauled out they went back to the waiting room while the rescue team went outside to regroup.

Gueira’s attracting a crowd, but he scares them off with a glare and threats.

Normally Meis would make him shut it down, but he’s not saying anything.

That should probably be a red flag, but Gueira’s too busy being pissed to realize it.

“Did we…”

Turning his head at the sound of Meis’ voice, quiet and unsure, not the one Meis would ever use in public, Gueira’s expression turns to worry.

“Babe?” He says in concern, the worry growing when Meis won’t lift his head, a curtain of hair keeping his face hidden.

“Did we do this?” He finally says, still not looking up. “Is this our fault? Did we squeeze everything out of him, did we make him carry too much of the weight? Is that why he couldn’t talk to us?”

Gueira, can’t say anything.

“Is that why he thinks we hate him, did we take too much?”

“Hey,” Gueira tries to call as he powerwalks and falls to sit on his haunches in front of his partner, “Hey, don’t do that yourself Meisies, c’mon.” Slipping his hands to cup the other’s cheeks, he continues, “Okay, yeah, we really screwed up, and now Boss is paying for it. We messed up.”

Meis doesn’t lift his head.

“But we always screw up, that’s just us. And you know what we do? We fix it.” Nodding a bit, he says, “Yeah, we fix the shit we messed up and we don’t let anything stop us. Yeah, it’s gonna be hard, but we’re always ready to take whatever the fuckin’ universe throws at us, right? Right?”

He’s a dork, but he just earned a chuckle.

Gueira apparently takes that as permission to keep goin’.

“We swore we’d follow him through hell, but right now we’re gonna pull his head outta there okay? We’re gonna fix it Meis, we’re gonna help him.”

Meis finally lifts his head up, an amused look on his face.

“Yer a schmaltzy ol’ son of a bitch, aren’t ya darlin’?” He asks with a tired smile.

This makes Gueira’s face light up before he bonks their heads together, Meis sliding his hands on top of Gueira’s and clutching them.

“We’ll figure it out Meis,” Gueira promises.

“We’ll help Boss.”

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

After a quick meeting outside, Burning Rescue just barely beat Dr. Bievve to the waiting room.

“Oh good,” the doctor says, “You’re all here.”

“Is Lio okay?!” Galo yells just as Gueira yells, “What’s up with Boss?!”

“I’d prefer to discuss the specifics with Captain Ex alone later,” she says, “But for now, all I can say is that he is clearly suffering from, for lack of a better term, burn out.”

“…”

“I am aware of the obvious pun, and I am not proud.”

“I see,” the captain says thoughtfully.

“He has overworked himself to the point of hospitalization, so I would highly advise that you all refrain from giving him any avoidable assignments for the near future.”

“Of course.”

“That’s all burn out?!” Aina asks in disbelief. “Come on, there is definitely more to it than that!”

“I apologize,” Dr. Bievve tells her, “But I can’t tell you anymore than what I have without violating doctor-patient confidentiality, what I’ve already told you is stretching it as is.”

“Well forget about them!” Gueira declares. “What do we do to fix him?”

“For now,” Dr.Bievve says, “Mr. Fotia will need to be kept from any highly stressful situations while continuing treatment, which brings me to my next point.” Taking a breath, she calls, “Mr. Thymos, may I speak to you alone for a moment?”

“Oh!” Galo says in surprise, “Uh, sure!”

“Right this way please,” she directs, walking off with him to the side.

“Vinny…” the rat mutters, eyes welling up with tears on Aina’s shoulder.

“It’s okay,” the woman tries to comfort, “Lio just needs some time.”

“Poor kid…” Varys says to himself, “He’s way too young to be goin’ through somethin’ like that.”

“Boss…” Meis mutters, Gueira taking his hand.

_“What the hell?! No!”_

Turning their heads, they see Galo storming off from the doctor.

“Mr. Thymos, please!” She calls out as she walks after him. “For the time being, it’s important that-”

“I’m not breaking up with Lio!”

…

“What?!” Aina says in shock.

“Please,” the doctor tries to cut in, “Mr. Fotia needs time to learn to focus on himself, a romantic relationship would only complicate things at this time!”

“I can help Lio!” Galo argues. “I’m not gonna leave him alone like this!”

“I am not saying that you would,” she tries, lifting her hands up in a placating matter, “You would still play an important part in his recovery, but in my opinion from what I’ve witnessed, Mr. Fotia needs to reach a better relationship with himself before attempting a more intimate one with somebody else.”

“I can handle Lio when he’s like this,” Galo claims, “We can make it work.”

“I’m not doubting that, but please, he just needs some time before he throws himself into something like this, at least enough to better understand how to properly handle being a part of that kind of relationship.”

“Galo,” Remi cuts in, placing a hand on his shoulder, “Lio needs a break.”

“…”

“I’m sorry, but it’s the best thing for right now.”

…

He knows they’re right.

He knows they rushed into this.

He knows Lio probably needed more time.

He knows Lio needs to take some time for himself.

Galo knows all of this.

…

He just hates it.

Looking at his feet, Galo gives a nod.

“I promise you,” Dr. Bievve says gently, “This is the best thing you can do for him right now.”

“It’s not forever,” Remi tries to reassure him, “Just…see it as a little break from each other.”

“…Sure.”

“Okay,” Dr. Bievve continues, “Along those lines, I’d like to move Mr. Fotia somewhere else where he has a less pressing relationship with the inhabitants.”

“He can stay with us,” Gueira offers, Meis nodding in agreement, “We’ll take care of him.”

“Absolutely not.”

Before Gueira can make his way over and yell at her, Dr. Bievve continues, “At the moment, Mr. Fotia’s feelings towards you two are too complicated to make the arrangement ideal, I would prefer he stayed with someone he did not have overly complicated relations with.”

“Listen you-!”

“He can stay at my place.”

Turning their heads, everyone regards with surprise-

“Lucia?” Aina says. “You want to let Lio stay at your place?”

“Yeah,” the genius says casually, “You said it yourself, he likes me better than the rest of you, and let’s face it, you guys like to get into other people’s business a lot.” Shaking her head, she adds, “Sit-down Squad don’t play those games.”

“Vinny!” The rat agrees.

“That…” Dr. Bievve starts, “Might work out the best.”

“I’ll talk to the parole board,” Ignis agrees, “Get something about a housing situation change.”

After that, Meis shoves a napkin and sharpie in front of Lucia’s face instructing, “Address. Now.”

“Pushy,” the girl snarks as she follows his orders.

“Galo?” Aina asks carefully, “Are you okay?”

“…Yeah,” He says softly before perking up and declaring, “Yeah! I’m good!”

“Ugghh…” Varys mutters awkwardly.

“Lio’ll pull through!” Galo says proudly. “His burning soul may be put out for the moment, but he’ll be back up and at it in no time!” Pointing at his chest with his thumb, he smirks and enthuses, “My burning heart is filled with enough love to keep me burning for a million years alone, this’ll be nothing!”

“…”

“But first!” He declares, turning on his heel, “I need to use the bathroom!” And with that, he marches off.

“…Idiot.”

Lio’s gonna be okay.

You can do this.

Walking into a stall, he falls to his knees and ejects his lunch.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

It’s quiet again.

It never stopped being cold, though.

…He doesn’t really care about that anymore.

The flames aren’t coming back, and if they did, they’d be too disgusted by him to ever let him touch them again.

He can’t blame them, he’s disgusted too.

He’ll avoid the warmth and light he doesn’t deserve.

Tears sliding down his cheeks, he awaits the embrace of the cold and dark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize if any of this seems unrealistic, I do not have much experience with the medical and psychiatric fields. From here on out though, I believe you will find a much more hopeful story.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When all your flames are reduced to ash, what do you do?  
> Maybe it's not a bad idea to let yourself crumble into nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for the long wait! I was rather caught up in my personal life, but I promise that this fic shall be done soon! So please enjoy!

He’s being sent away.

_“Just for a bit Lio,” Galo tried to patronize him, “You and I just…need a little time apart! But we’ll be back to sweet Lio de Galon lovin’ before ya know it!”_

He’s not an idiot.

Galo’s tired.

He’s tired of him.

He pushed him too far, and now he’s hurting him.

It was inevitable.

He’s only ever brought Galo misery.

Now that the others are stepping in, they can’t avoid the truth anymore.

Galo needs him to leave.

Lio needs to leave.

It’s the only thing he’s ever been good for.

“C’mon Princess!” Dr. Fex calls to him as they climb the staircase to her apartment. “Just a few more steps to my cave!”

Unamused, he bites back, “Until you have actually had to sleep in a cave, I would appreciate it if you would refrain from comparing your fully stable and functional apartment to one.”

“Ohhhh!” She grunts teasingly, “That’s the most sass we’ve gotten outta you in days! And to me, your gracious host!”

“You’re right, I am being ungrateful, I apologize.”

“Uggghhhhh! Dude! How long are you gonna keep moping?! We want our feisty little anarchist firestarter back, man!”

“…I apologize.”

Giving him an oddly…worried look (something he never expected to see from her, a testament to how his presence is nothing but a disruption to the enjoyment of others) Dr. Fex recollects herself to give a retinal scan to a sensor on her door before it opens.

“Welcome,” She declares as she holds the door open and gestures to the interior, “To the Den of Madness!”

An apt description, honestly.

Half-formed machinery is scattered all throughout the general space, the amount of technology only rivaled by the completely unnecessary amount of pillows interspersed with them. A large television set is hooked into the wall, flanked by what he presumes to be video game consoles and several other monitors as well as something resembling a stereo set he saw advertised in a store window once. Blueprints for projects line the walls, floor, shelves, anywhere they can be seen well enough. Snack containers and clothes litter whatever space is left. The only furniture visible is a couch covered in leftover boxes and clothing and a rather enormous bean bag chair modeled after some sort of pig…mole…thing with large black eyes and a pink star on the back that takes up a quarter of the room.

It’s…a total dump, for lack of better words.

…

It’s more than he deserves.

“Thank you,” he says almost unconsciously as he walks into the apartment. “I will try not to be a burden.”

But if he’s not, what is he?

Wasting time is all he’s good for now.

So does he just disappear?

“I’d say feel free to unpack your stuff,” he thinks he hears Dr. Fex say, “But you literally only have the clothes on your back.” She then adds, “Oh, all the pillows are in case you get tired. I’m usually working on something, so I just leave ‘em there in case I pass out. Easier than wasting time buying a bed.”

Oh wait.

He forgot.

He’s a monster too.

He can hurt her.

He’s already hurt everyone else.

It’s his only skill, hurting people.

“Buddy?”

_“Lio…” Galo pleads, “Just lift your head up and say you don’t want to go, I’ll back you up!”_

_“…”_

_“C’mon! You need to tell me something! Anything! Look at me!”_

_“…”_

_“…Do you want to leave?”_

_“…”_

_“Will that make you happy?”_

_“…”_

_“…Okay,” he hears Galo say with water in his voice, “I’ll go let everyone know you’re cool with movin’ in with Lucia.”_

_“…”_

_As the door opens, he hears Galo say, “Just because the flames have gone out, that doesn’t mean your burning soul won’t light up again.”_

_“…”_

_“It blazes just as much as mine, y’know?”_

_He hears the door shut._

_The tears start flooding again._

“…io…Lio!”

Gasping at the loud voice calling his name, hands going to the sides of his head, his mind focuses back on reality and turns his vision back to Dr. Fex.

“Hey!” She says with confusion, “I’ve been trying to talk to you for like half an hour!” Noticing his shaking form, she tries with a quieter tone, “You okay?”

Choking out a sob he falls to his knees, wrapping his arms around them as he buries his face while he cries.

“…I’ll…call your therapist, okay?”

He shakes his head, he doesn’t trust his ability to speak right now.

“Okay…you want me to just…let you do your thing?”

After a pause, he nods.

“Alright, uh…just…cry yourself out buddy.”

That’s all he can do anymore.

He can’t control himself anymore, whatever strength he had is gone.

Anyone who sees him will see the truth now.

There was no strong, capable leader.

Just a weak monster.

They’ve all seen it.

_Galo…_

_I’m so sorry…_

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

“Welcome,” Dr. Bievve greets as he enters her office, gesturing for him to take a seat, “Did you find the building alright?”

“Yes,” Lio confirms as he sits down, “And…I would like to apologize for my behavior at the hospital, it was…” he trails off, gripping his knees, “…inappropriate, to say the least.”

“Mr. Fotia,” the doctor tries to sympathize, “As your doctor, it’s my job to assist you through your emotional distress. I only regret that I was unable to assist you with calming down.”

“That is…not your…”

Well, technically it is, it’s quite literally what she’s being paid to do.

“Even so,” Lio eventually manages to say, “I should have controlled myself better.”

“Because you want to look professional,” Dr. Bievve asks, “Or because you’ve conditioned yourself to believe you don’t have the option to show vulnerability?”

“Doctor,” Lio challenges, “I assure you that my emotional wellbeing is unnecessary to focus on and that I will be able to keep myself under control much better now.”

“Why do you want to?”

“Doctor?”

“What’s wrong with allowing yourself to feel your emotions instead of repressing them? To be blunt,” she takes a breath, “This denial of your feelings is the direct reason why you ended up in the state you are in.”

“I apologize if I sound disrespectful,” Lio grits out, before he forces his voice to smooth itself out. “But I find this whole arrangement to be utterly pointless.”

“How so?” The doctor challenges.

“You are wasting a service that is needed by many others on someone who does not need it.” Lio answers. “I will not allow my feelings to get the better of me again, therefore you and your associates should focus on people that will not be able to function without your assistance.”

“Without our assistance,” Dr. Bievve retorts calmly, “There is a good chance you will continue to suppress your emotions and another outburst will occur, leading to the further detriment of your mental state.”

Shaking slightly in aggravation that he can’t seem to keep from rising, he grits out, “There is no need to do anything, I will continue as I have and do what I have come here to do. So I thank you, but I will handle my emotions by myself.”

“Mr. Fotia, there is no shame in expressing how you feel.” With a sympathetic gaze, she asks, “Why do you prevent yourself from feeling anything, why are you so afraid to acknowledge your emotions?”

_FWOOSH!_

Another spark blew out and evaporated into nothing.

“YOU SAW WHAT HAPPENED!” He screams as he jumps to his feet, control lost at record time. “I tried to burn the city!” Tears rush to his eyes as he continues his tirade. “Whenever I lose control, people get hurt!” Falling to his knees, he sobs, “I’m sorry…”

“Mr. Fotia…”

It won’t stop.

No matter how much he tries, he can’t stop it.

It bubbles under his skin, his head swells with it and now it’s seeping out, filling up every space it can find with his weakness.

Everyone’s seen it.

Everyone knows he’s a failure.

He hurts them.

He can’t stop.

He’s trying so hard, but it. Won’t. Stop.

He can’t stop it anymore.

Why?

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Captain Ex has agreed to drive him to his appointments.

He’ll be doing these daily for some time, until he’s capable of being seen as “stable.”

“…I’m sorry.” The older man tells him. “We should have done something sooner.”

Lio looks into the distance.

The Captain makes a very sharp turn with a grunt of frustration.

“I’m so sorry.”  
………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

_“Why are you doing this?” He moans. “Why is everyone doing things like this for me?”_

_“Because,” Dr. Bievve says as she crouches in front of his huddled form, “I, like many other people, believe that you deserve to live your life without unjustly hating yourself.”_

_“…Why?”_

_“Why not?”_

_“Because I don’t deserve it.”_

_“If you feel like telling me,” she says gently, “I’d like to know why you think that.”_

_“…”_

_“If you don’t want to, it’s okay.”_

_She sounds like Galo._

_Perceptive, cuts to the point._

_Sees right through him._

_Doesn’t push when he can’t take it._

_Forgives him._

_Wants to help._

_“…”_

_“Mr. Fotia?”_

_“…I hurt people.”_

_“…”_

_“I hurt people when I’m like this.”_

_“…Yes.”_

_“I don’t want to.”_

_“You don’t have to.”_

_…How does he do that?_

_How does he retake control?_

_“You know,” the doctor begins to say, “You have an hour here.”_

_“…”_

_“If you’d rather talk about anything else, we can. I mean, it’d be pretty boring if we just sat here quietly staring at each other. Unless that’s what you want.”_

_“…”_

_…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………._

It’s quiet at headquarters.

“Vinny…” the rat mumbles.

Varys sighs.

“We should have done something,” Aina says. “We all knew he wouldn’t be okay after everything, but we just let it happen.” Glaring, she pounds the table with her fist. “Why didn’t we do anything?”

“You can’t help someone if they don’t let you.” Remi tries. “And Fotia has so many walls built up, I don’t think he knows how to let someone help him.”

“That’s not an excuse.” She shoots down.

“Well he’s getting help now,” Varys comforts, putting a hand on her shoulder.

“Vinny,” Vinny agrees, nuzzling against her sweetly.

“He’ll be fine,” Remi encourages, “We’re ready to help.”

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

_After settling down and returning to his seat, Lio starts, “I…apologize. Again, this behavior is…I don’t know what’s coming over me.”_

_“I think I have a theory,” Dr. Bievve says as she offers him a tissue box. “But let’s talk about something else first. Is that alright?”_

_“…Yes.”_

_…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………._

“Now,” Meis starts from where he sits on Gueira, the idiot finally ceasing to reach for the doorknob, “What are we not gonna do?”

Grumbling, Gueira mutters, “Run over to that science bitch’s apartment and see Boss.”

“And why?”

“’Cause he’s not ready ta see us.”

“And we?”

“Respect his boundaries.”

“Good boy,” Meis praises, patting the ball of puff on Gueira’s head.

“…I wanna see him.” Gueira says, looking at his floor.

“I know hothead,” Meis sympathizes, pulling Gueira into his arms, tucking his partner’s head into his shoulder.

“I know.”

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

_“…”_

_“Mr. Fotia?”_

_“…I failed.”_

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

“Lio!” Galo calls out bombastically as he swings open the apartment door. “I’m baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!”

…

“Oh yeah,” Galo says to himself in realization, “He’s not here anymore.”

…

Falling to his knees before collapsing onto his side, Galo pulls his knees to his chest and begins to sob.

Lio left.

Everyone always leaves.

He couldn’t help him.

He couldn’t save him.

He let him get worse.

It’s his fault.

Kray was right, he’s a cancer.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

_“You’re blaming yourself for forces you couldn’t control or have foreseen,” Dr. Bievve tells him. “Do you think it’s fair to do that to yourself?”_

_“…It’s not important.”_

_“Why aren’t you?”_

_“…”_

_“…”_

_She has no right to ask that._

_Like he has no right to hurt people because he can’t understand how to process his emotions like a human being should._

_But…she’s studied human behavior._

_She does know how to do things._

_And he doesn’t._

_He’s failed again._

_And he doesn’t know how to fix it._

_Does he just stop?_

_Does he stay extinguished?_

_Does he remain still, surrounded by failure?_

_Does he run away again?_

_“…Doctor?”_

_“Yes?”_

_“What do I have to do,” he asks, quietly but firmly, “To be stable?_

_Pausing, Dr. Bievve takes a minute before telling him, “Well, trying to understand how you ended up here is the first step.”_

_“And the next?”_

_“Actually dealing with it.”_

_…He’s been running for so long._

_From Freeze Force, Foresight, confrontation, weakness, loved ones._

_He runs._

_And now he’s at a dead end._

_Where he’ll stay, the ashes of his flames all that’s left of him before they fade away._

_…_

_…_

_…Screw that._

_“I…” he starts again, “Have to be here.”_

_“Yes.”_

_He has to go again._

_“People want me to be here.”_

_“Yes.”_

_He needs to be brave._

_The others are and they want him to catch up to them._

_He cannot sit by while the pain he’s caused continues to exist._

_He needs to fix things._

_“I think…”_

_They think he can do it._

_“I think…I would like to try.”_

_And he must live to their expectations._

_He must find a place in this world, for those he treasures._

_They’ve already sent him here, he mustn’t waste their generosity._

_Even if he is a failure…_

_“I would like to try to get better.”_

_He will fail while he gives it his all, putting every ounce of himself into his efforts, as he always has._

_“Alright then,” Dr. Bievve agrees._

_He is a failure._

_He is a monster._

_“I’m ready to listen when you’re ready to speak.” She tells him._

_And he will still light the flames inside of him again, and burn until he’s become that which he needs to be._

_Strong._

_Reliable._

_Burning._


End file.
